Chapter 18- I'm right here

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If you love me,
Please forgive me.
I'm right here
Please forgive me
Please forgive me....

For this chapter, listen to its raining, it's pouring by Anson Seabra.

It was two in the morning when we left the party. There wasn't any sign of a car on the road we used to get back home. Even the birds were quiet. The silence in the car surrounded us like a horror movie. It was scary and full of thoughts. I didn't know how to start talking to Yosef. After what happened back an hour ago, I doubt whether he wanted to here my voice.

"Do you want to sleepover at my house or at Lindsey's?" He finally spoke.

"Literally yours, because it's too late to go at Lindsey's." I replied.

It took us another 20 minutes till we got to his home. As the gentleman he is, he still opened the car door for me and I stepped out. After locking the car, I followed behind him to the main house.

When we entered inside, the lights were off and it was dark. Not so dark though, because the curtains were open and brought some rays of light from the moon.

"I'll get the lights on." He said as he headed to the right side of the wall.

"Yosef...wait."

I could feel he stopped moving, because I could no longer hear his footsteps.

"Are you mad at me?" I asked.

"Why would I be mad?" He exhaled.

"Just because Kylie fucked you doesn't give me a reason to be."

"Yosef." I breathed out a sigh while walking towards him. I blinked my eyes so many times to not let the tears run down my cheeks. I was so guilty. "It didn't happen. Believe me. We were just hanging out and..."

"Hanging out? In the washrooms? Do you take me for a fool?" He sounded bitter.

"No no, I don't. And I want you to believe me. We didn't do anything." My voice cracked. "And I wasn't with her in the washrooms." I was almost in the verge of crying. So stupid of me.

"So who were you with then? Huh? Because I know Kylie so well. From the time you guys went inside to get some drinks, I knew something fishy was going to come up." He shouted and let out a sigh while raking a hand through his messy hair.

Words left me. I stared into those bright grey eyes burning with anger and my heart fell silent. "Answer me! Who were you with then?" He roared. But I couldn't will my lips to move. As if stuck underwater, everything was slow and warbled.

He then held me and put me on the wall, wrists handcuffed to his hands and kissed me so roughly. I could feel he was so angry. And I remember what Kylie told me. His anger was like a lions'.

He let go of me and sat down on the floor, face cupped into his palms, and legs folded. I felt bad I made him feel this way. It was all my fault, honestly. I let my sexual desires get over me and take control. And now look what they caused. Anger, pain, sorrow and depression.

I moved close and sat next to him. I pulled his chin up so that he faces me, but his eyes shifted to the side. His dark lashes brimmed heavy with tears, his hands clenched into shaking fists, in a desperate battle against the grief.

As he blinked, they dropped from his eyelids and slid down his cheeks. He bit his lower lip tightly in attempt to hide any sound that wanted to escape from his mouth, my heart sank.

His lower lip quivered as words slowly made their way out of his mouth. "I love you so much Xhey, and..." He began, yet what followed was engulfed in tremors.

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