shell

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song: Stained Glass by Madison Beer

*

Mike feels like he's drowning.

He's can't swim in this pool of sorrow and despair that he's been thrown into. He can kick and struggle to try and stay afloat, but he will never be able to stay above water. He's tried calling out for help so many times, but no one can hear him.

He's all alone and no one can save him now.

Their pity stares and apologies mean nothing to him. Their words can't get her back to him. She's gone and no one seems to care about it more than Mike. It feels like everyone is moving on without him, and they just.. forgot about her. They got what they needed, so why should El's well being matter to them?

But not to Mike.

He couldn't forget about her if he tried.

Though he only knew her for a mere week, and barely spoke words to him, he felt like their bond was way beyond whatever words could explain. What they had was special, far more special than any kind of relationship he's seen before. It wasn't about how well they knew each other, or how long they've known each other, it was about the trust that they had. Mike was the first person she ever trusted, the first person who made her smile and laugh, and that's a hell lot more than what Papa could do for her. Mike provided a safe home for her to stay, and loving friends, even though they were skeptical at first, Mike always believed in her.

He knew what they had was special and he wouldn't forget about it, nor let another girl take her spot. How could anyone replace her? They couldn't.

Mike can't tell you how many times he's gone down to the basement just to try and communicate with her. He's called her every day since she's been gone now, and he hasn't heard a word back.

But whenever he calls her, and waits for a few minutes.. it feels like she's there. Like she's listening to him and calling him back. He just can't hear her. He can feel her there. He just knows she's alive.

But although he knows she's still out there, that won't take away the incredible sadness that has overcome him. He can't go a day without the feeling of hopelessness settling upon his shoulders. He just wants the feeling to end. The feeling where it feels like there's something caught in your throat whenever you try to tell someone, or get someone to help. He just wants it to stop, but he doesn't know how to stop it.

There are a few ways he can think of, but the best thought is El. She understood him. She listened to him, to what he had to say and didn't judge him. She protected him when he was in danger. She didn't have to say anything back to let him know that she understood, the look in her eyes told him everything.

He just wanted her back.

*

Today was the final due date for Mike's essay on pollution. He didn't really pay attention in class as to what he had to include in this essay, but all he knew was that it was worth 75% of his final grade. Mike couldn't care less.

How could anything matter when he didn't have anyone to tell his accomplishments to? Sure, he could tell his friends, but they were just as smart as him, if not smarter. They didn't care about his essays, but he knew El would be interested. She would ask him questions an she could explain it, but he couldn't do that now.

What's the point in even trying?

As that thought circulated in his brain, he didn't even do his essay. That's right, Michael Wheeler, King of Nerds, did not even write one sentence for an essay worth most of his grade. He cared enough to not go into class empty handed, so he grabbed one of Nancy's old essays from 8th grade and changed a few things before he left for school.

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