Strangers | CallMeCarson FF

(5) secret

At first Carson got embarrassed everytime he had to ask for my help but as he recognized I didn't care, he became more confident and began joking about him being 'dumb baby'.
I laughed and looked at his computer screen to answer another question, since I had finished my homework already.

"I don't want to do this! How can you be this smart? " I just smiled a little and looked at the text he was writing.
"No I'm serious! How can you have an A in every class? " He seemed like he really needed an answer. But I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready to tell him about all of my non existing friends, and my sad study sessions in my room.
So I just shrugged and tried to get his attention back onto his homework.

Carson just pouted and continued typing.
Internally I was more than thankful that he had stopped asking.
When Carson was almost done with his homework I looked at the time on his screen. It was almost 8 . Carson noticed too and began printing his essay.

"So I'm going to stream again soon. Do you want to stay again? "
I was unsure I didn't want to be outside at a late hour. On the other hand I wanted to do everything I could to become his friend and to make him want to see me again.
"Don't feel pressured! You don't have to. "

I looked at him and half smiled "I would prefer going home if I'm honest" .
Carson looked disappointed for just a second before he was his grinning self again. "Sure, of course. ", he mumbled and I led me out of his room. I missed it already, I felt so at home in there it was strange.

When we arrived in his living room he pointed to a couch, so I sat down while he searched for his car keys.
Cooper was seated next to me.
" So you liked the stream? "He asked scanning my face. I just nodded and felt a little uncomfortable.
" You like Carson?" He asked and scanned my face again. I didn't nod. I didn't want him to tell carson the wrong thing and jeopardize our friendship.
"You see, Carson was fucked over by a girl not long ago. She took his happiness and his smile. He really got depressed, he still is... You aren't going to do something like that to him? Are you? "

I slowly shook my head and felt a clump in my throat. I knew if I'd say something it immediately start to cry. I just felt so uncomfortable, sitting on this couch and being judged for something I didn't do, by someone I thought liked me.
I turned away from Cooper and started going through my phone. After a while Carson's came into the room.

"Ready to go?" He asked grinning but I couldn't bring myself to smile. I just stood up and followed him outside.
During the ride Carson tried to build up a conversation but I answered all his questions by shrugging and looking out the window.
After a while he stopped trying.

When we arrived at campus he turned of the car and turned to me.
"Look Anna, I know I wasn't very impressive with the homework today bu-.. I'm not dumb! It's just-.. I-.. " He looked at his hands and it seemed he was really uneasy.

"If you don't want to talk to me anymore-.. I get it. Well.. Today was really nice. " I looked up to him. His smile was clearly fake and his eyes looked really hurt.