Over Him... (Sort Of)

51.

JADA POV

When I woke up... the bed was empty. Knowing Chris he probably went to get bagels from his favorite store. I went into the bathroom and did Th e usual hygiene check. Making my way to Gianna's room I pushed open the door but it was empty.

I sighed and walked to the kitchen where Chris was holding her "oh look mommy finally woke up".

"After me stubbing my pinky toe I was done for the night" I joked.

"How's the toe?" He asked. Taking Gianna from him so I can change her. "It fine now but the nail chipped. That's what caused the pain".

"Got to be careful next time. Oh I changed her and fed her too" he smiled.

"Say what? You did all of that by yourself? With no issues? Interesting..." I said.

"What can I say? I'm good at what I do" he smirked.

"Coming from the guy who was having a panic attack cause she was crying the other night" I said. He side eyed me "it got a little crazy. But I'm good".

Taking a seat next to him "got your favorite spread for your bagels".

"Hmm... not really feeling bagels this morning. But oatmeal sounds good" I said. He stopped eating and turned to me "you aren't feeling bagels?! But would rather eat oatmeal?". I nodded "yeah".

"Is jada in there?" He joked.

"Very funny! But bagels are high in carbs" I said.

He rolled his eyes "oh no! Look I already told you that you look fine to me. With the extra weight on your hips and ass. And boobs too. I'm not complaining what so ever. Don't go starving yourself".

"Well I'm not looking good for you! I'm trying to be comfortable in my own skin. With this added fifteen pounds... its making me self conscious" I said. Chris turned me around "look at me! Jada you aren't a ugly person. Very pretty in fact. You carry this weight well. Don't drive yourself crazy trying to satisfy yourself. Once you lose the fifteen pounds it'll be something else bothering you".

"Excuse me, I want to make my oatmeal" I said. He took Gianna while I went to the stove to heat up some milk. "Also we need almond milk. It's healthier".

Chris shook his head "Gianna it's going to be a long week with mom". Reaching inside the cabinet to get the container of oatmeal. "Sometimes a healthy mind needs a healthy diet".

"Or maybe I can help you with that" Chris smiled.

"No thank you" I said.

"I think my idea was a better choice... at least you can eat what you want. You'll burn off those extra calories easily" he said.

Ignoring Chris at the moment... I went on to continue making my breakfast. Grabbing a banana and slicing it up to add that in. When I was done I sat down. Chris scrunched up his face "doesn't look appetizing at all!".

"Don't care what you think" I said. He watched me take that first bite "yeah you definitely didn't enjoy that".

"Chris shhh..." I said.

Since we were both home today. We just did nothing all day. "Damn I feel like we should've went somewhere" he said.

"I'm really not in the mood to go out" I said.

He nodded "yeah... plus Netflix has been good so far".

"Exactly! We just binge watched two season of you. Even though you tried to ruin the damn show for me" I said.

"Just wanted to make sure you were understanding what was going on" he smiled.

"Crazy how joe grew up... which made him into the person he is" I said.

"That's what usually happens. Speak about mothers. How are you digesting with what your dad told you?" He asked.

"With Gianna I can't really focus on it. But... when Paula's brother was assaulting me... he did mention how my mom killed her self" I said.

"Really? Well he is Paula brother. You guys are close so news traveled fast back then. How old is he anyway?" He asked.

"Same age as you" I said.

"Wow! And he looks older than me. He has no comparison to my baby face" he joked.

Shaking my head "focus".

"Let's do the math. You were nine when this all happened. We are what... eleven or twelve years apart. So when this happened he was twenty one. Damn I'm on point with my math today" he said.

"Didn't realize he was so much older than me... being nine I guess you just see people as old" I said.

"Like I said news travel fast... especially something like that. But I am happy your brain took over what you witnessed and it didn't traumatize you" he said.

I didn't Respond cause honestly I can't remember a single thing from that day. Nothing.

"Your brain protected you from the images you saw. Which in a way is a good thing. I couldn't imagine how you would've handled seeing that visual of someone harming themselves" he said.

"I just don't understand how a parent can kill themself knowing the child will be parent less. I could never even think about doing that knowing Gianna will be motherless" I said.

"Well we don't know where her mental state was... we don't know what she was thinking or fighting with before she did what she did. Trust me, I can bet you anything she fought with the idea of leaving you. But when someone is weak minded the mind can overpower any rational decision making" he said.

I didn't respond. Feeling his hand on my thigh "how about we start a new show?".

"How about... something funny. I need to laugh" I said. He nodded and went scrolling through different comedies to watch.