Another Requiem And Forgotten Dream

chapter 2

Cassie

“Come on it will be okay, a new place you can reinvent yourself” they said, they said it like reinvention was a good thing, god they were stupid. Nobody seems to warn you that trying to be someone else can be so dangerous. Nobody tells you about how secrets can kill some, and save others and that you don’t choose who gets hurt- it just happens. I guess I always come clean, and kill everyone who I saved, in hope that it will end my murderous lies. If I do though I could lose the only person I care about: Steph.

I will never be what they want me to be, and I guess that’s what landed me here. In my damp but comforting tree house I lay, I lay across the wooden floor staring through the hole in the ceiling looking a the stars think about how I am looking in the past and how some of them might be dead and how I wouldn’t know if they were. I didn’t deserve to know. I didn’t have anything; I only needed someone to care, but the people care I didn’t see clearly. Yet here I am with my life in my hands and now there is no way out. How the fuck did I get here? Well I guess it started at the beginning of the year, when I met Steph.

Sitting in the office of my new school I could feel my body trembling, “I know its scary but you’ll be fine” Jamie my new “father” said trying to reassure me as he signed some paper, his wife Anne said the same thing the she took me from my foster home, I responded with the identical words then “Sure, if you say so”. I wasn’t meaning to be rude or anything but I was quite comfortable before they came into my life and now everything has changed.

 “Heres your schedule, your first lesson is English. Just follow the signs and you’ll find it fine” the old woman at the desk croaked. At this time the bell for first period had already gone, so I could make my presence go unnoticed therefore I might as well make my introduction remember able and take the advice of Anne: “you can reinvent yourself.”

Looking through the door of my new English room I could see that everyone arrived and settled into their seat for the year, the class had already begun. As I entered the room all head turned to face me, this is where I would usually run off with embarrassment but like I said I was going to be a new me. “Hello, I’m new, supposed to be in this class.” I spoke carelessly like I didn’t give a fuck.

“Yes you must be Cadence Smith; would you like to share what you know about Of Mice and Men?” the teacher asked, as I went to sit down at the almost empty table at the front of the room. I knew if I wanted to be noticed I would have to say something either really clever, stupid or fucking badass,, and since I didn’t know much about Of Mice and Men and that I didn’t want to be known as stupid that later was my only real option. “Yeah sure, it’s this firkin’ amazing band fronted by Austin Carlile, and their mascot is a stuffed octopus teddy called Squidgy.” Honestly you couldn’t believe the adrenalin rush I got from that, felt so alive. Though speculating from the blank faces from all but one person it went over everyone heads and the teacher didn’t seem too impressed.

Well, that might be an understatement considering what came next: “Go out now!” she detonated. No retaliation, I just walked out, nothing abnormal about that. As I stood outside the wooden door, with peeling white paint, the only other person on the almost empty table of which I sat at came to join me.

Quietly she said “Hey, I’m Stephanie Leigh Anderson, most people just call me Steph” with her hand held out, I didn’t feel like shaking it. Down at her (she was quiet small for a 16 year old) I catch sight of a marking in the centre of her forehead, some sort of scar, of which they must have been a story behind.

“I’m Cadence Tora Sayō Smith, call me Cassie” I smiled. I don’t know why Steph followed me out of the room that lesson but I’m glad she did- my first and only friend I will ever have. Sure she was modestly weird but aren’t we all, most just hide that part of them, that why I became drawn to her everything she did had meaning she wasn’t just some sort of sheep.

It turn out that she had ever lesson with me, she was the only person other than me that loved music and maths, most people find that somewhat peculiar. That lunch we sat alone as Steph guided me to the table at the back of the dinning hall she proudly gestured the words “Welcome to the loser table.” Nice to know nothing has changed too much: I’m still a loser but this time I’m a feared loser. “So where have ya come from? You’re defiantly not from round here dressed like that” she asked. I did stand out like a sore thumb, at my old place there would be a few people dress like me: black jeans, red braces and a band top (Miss May I of course).

“Yeah I see that, I’m from further up north” I wasn’t going to tell her where, so she could dig for more information about me. Compared the Steph’s innocent reddish brown hair like the autumn leaves I looked so strange.

The rest of the school day went by no problem, I gave Steph my phone number, despite not being able to us it. Anne picked me you from out side the gates “see that wasn’t so bad now was it?”

“Nope” I replied.

“Do you want to watch some TV tonight?” she asked in attempt to make conversation.

“No, I was going to just go to the tree house,” the tree house was the best part of this place, I could be alone and nobody gave a damn about what I did there, I can hide that quirky part of me in the chest hidden in the secret compartments.

“Sorry love you can’t tonight you have school tomorrow.” Really because going to the tree house really affect my school work, don’t you think 15 years of moving around and swapping foster homes might has already done that.

“Fine I just go to bed” I moaned. When I got in I climbed up to the attic and laid in bed, a sort of revelation without them knowing.