Down at the Cove

thinking of you

Charlotte could not sleep that night either.

Once again, Mr. Sidney Parker was to blame. No sooner did she close her eyes than she saw him there. How he kneels in front of her, rolls the stockings over her leg, ties the band and touches it lovingly. Each time she feels his fingers back on her skin, it burns and a strange warm feeling spreads through her body. Even in places where neither he nor anyone else had ever touched her. And she wished he would. Touch her again like he had. But her mind added this other places where she would like to be touched by him. It was shocking!

Her body reacted again with that weird heat, everything was too tight and too hot again. She would have loved to leave the house immediately and jump into the floods.

Throwing herself around in bed, she got up and walked back to the window. Again she pressed her heated body against it, to cool it down. It tickles. It hurt in a peculiar way, but it wasn't painful.

It was so confusing. What could she do? She wants to ask someone how she can get rid of these feelings. Maybe she'd get sick after all. She felt sick. Feverish. Her stomach was making strange movements. It contracted every time she heard Mr. Sidney's voice. When his gaze bored into her eyes, her body began to react. It reacted exactly as it did right now.

Charlotte was ashamed.

Not only for the images that crept into her head. But for wishing it were his hands and not hers, slowly moving over her arms to her shoulders, hesitantly and lightly stroking the collar of her nightgown. She wrapped her arms around herself and wished they were his, embracing her from behind and pressing her against his strong body. Oh, what was he doing to her! And every time he looked at her like he was angry. She hadn't done anything, it was him! She didn't ask him to put her stockings on her.

She knew, she had to talk to him. What an embarrassing moment this would be!

The next day, she tried to be strong and really sought his closeness. But then she was so shy, she couldn't get a word out. She couldn't even look at him, turning on her heels and literally fled from him.

Sidney knew he had to do something. Charlotte didn't seem to be herself anymore at all. She stood there in front of him, with her big eyes, seemed to want to say something, but then her courage broke and she literally ran away. It was all very frustrating. Last night he had gone for a walk to calm his nerves and his heart. He wanted to get those pictures of her by the cove and her window out of his head.

But of course she was like him. It had to be that way. Because when he came back from his walk and his gaze wandered to her window as if by magic, she stood there. Again, her face and torso were pressed against the window. This time she were embracing herself. Her eyes were closed and the expression on her face seemed to be painful.

He had to get her alone and try to talk to her. Explain it to her. Apologize. With that thought, he didn't go back to the hotel, he went straight to Trafalgar House. Maybe she'd come down.

But she didn't.

The whole next day he didn't even get to see her. It wasn't until the evening when he came into the drawing room with Tom from the study.

She had apparently just made herself comfortable on the sofa to read. Mary sat on the armchair and was absorbed in her embroidery. Charlotte looked at him briefly and blushed immediately.

Tom cackled at him, but Sidney was so absorbed in watching Charlotte, that he didn't really hear what his brother said. She was pale and she looked thinner. Her cheeks were flushed. Chest rose and fell relatively quickly for someone who seemed to be sitting on a sofa, relaxed and pretending to read. He knew she was faking because she didn't turn a page or move her eyes. He thought she was bound to disappear into her room in the next few minutes.

Sidney was surprised when Mary suddenly got up and asked Tom to accompany her upstairs. Tom, always able to have a bad conscience towards his wife, was quickly convinced. Both said goodbye. And it was the first time Charlotte raised her head.

Biting her lower lip, her hands clenched in fists, she seemed to think about what to do now. Nervously, she slid back and forth in her seat. Their eyes met for a brief moment. But she lowered her gaze again immediately.

The silence streched out and he asked Charlotte with his softest voice,

„Miss Heywood,"

„Mr. Parker?" she didn't look up.

„This evening,...how often did you read the same page of this book?" 

She looked caught, big eyes fixed on a spot behind his head, licking her dry lips she took a deep breath, closed her eyes and said in all honest „I didn't read it once."

„Why is that?" his voice a deep vibration through her body. Looking on her book again she said blushing,

„You're distracting me."

He huffed a laugh.

„Well I can assure you, Miss Heywood. You are distracting me too. I didn't either know what Tom told me, neither I know what I agree to." Charlotte smirked, but wasn't able to answer that.

He came over to her. Shyly, she looked up at him as he reached out for her. Hesitantly, she placed her hand in his warmth. Immediately memories of the day at the cove washed over her.

Sidney pulled her up. They stood close enough to touch not only their hands. She trembled. Tugging her closer, he led her out of the room, up the stairs, in front of her room. At the door, he leaned closer to her and whispered in her ear,

"I guess we need to talk."