CRASH [COMPLETED]

XXXII Reconciliation

Lisa's POV

"I'm sorry Lis, but she really doesn't want to see you yet," Jisoo told me after she went out of Jennie's room.

It's been three days since that rooftop scenario happened and until now she's still not allowing me to see her. I keep coming back here but it's either she's not here or she doesn't want to talk to me.

But I know her enough to say that she's just really trying to avoid me. I hurt her and couldn't blame her.

I nodded my head at Jisoo and she just tapped my shoulders.

"Just give her time" she weakly smiled and I did the same.

I decided to leave for now but I will surely be back. I will never stop until she gave me a chance to talk to her. Before I leave I took a glance at her room door before I heave a deep sigh.

The next day I went to Jennie's house again but she's leaving with Kai. I clenched my jaw and I felt my grip on the steering wheel tightened when I saw her smiling towards him while he's assisting her to ride the shotgun seat. He was holding her at the small of her back and I swear I want to break those arms of him away from her.

I already told Jennie not to see him but here she is going out with him and with that, I felt so irritated.

Their car started to move and I followed them. I kept my distance so they won't notice my car coz I know Jennie will be mad at me when she knew I was tailing them and I don't want that to happen.

I'm doing this coz I just want to make sure that she's safe.

Their car stopped in a restaurant and Kai took Jennie's hand assisting her to exit the car. He put Jennie's hand on his arm as they walked towards the entrance.

My blood boils while watching them talking happily while eating the meal they ordered. Jennie seems to enjoy their conversation because she was showing him her gummy smile. I felt a pang in my chest seeing her happy talking to somebody that is not me.

She's not supposed to be smiling that way coz her gummy smile just belongs to me. I told myself.

But my other conscience is saying otherwise.

She was never yours you fool!

Yes, Jennie was never mine so I don't have the right to stop her from seeing someone. But I also cannot ignore this feeling inside of me. The irritation I felt whenever their skin touches and the anger I felt whenever she's showing her gummy smile to him. The feeling of wanting Jennie's attention on me. I always want her beside me and I swear I already missed her presence.

During the times that she's been avoiding me, I reflected. I think over my actions and feelings and then I realized something. I realized that I've been fooling myself since then when I courted Rosie. I thought I like her that's why I courted her but I realized I just did that coz I want to hurt Jin. I remembered I heard Jin told his friend over the phone that he likes Rosie and he's planning to court her, and because I wanted him to be miserable I courted Rosie first that made Jin back off. He gave way to me and never courted Rosie. I thought I love her but I realized I did not. I just like her and not love. I just love the thought of getting even with Jin. Back then I thought Jin took everything away from me that's why it's just fair to take Rosie away from him. I made myself believe I love her but I failed to show her the love that she deserves. She loved me more than anything else but all I did was to hurt her by choosing Jennie over her over and over again. When we broke up I was hurt, not because I love her but because Jin successfully took her away from me. That Jin now has everything that I used to have. And that angers me so much. I don't want him to be happy while I am being miserable. That's why when they came back and I saw them happy I got mad again. Not because I was jealous that he's getting married to Rosie now but because I don't want to see him happy. I was jealous that everything works together in his favor while I am miserable and sad.