new, spectacular,

"when i find it i'll let you know"

School was almost becoming unbearable to attend. It felt as if some mornings I'd just look in the mirror for 10 minutes spacing out. "Thinking back to it, I wish I begged my parents to put me in online school" Carmen groaned as we entered the school grounds. "You're telling me. But I know even I did my dad would refuse as I needed to make friends" I replied trying to keep up with Carmen's pace. "You good?" she asked taking attention to it as well. I nodded "yeah just feeling sluggish" I replied. All my movements felt slow. I'm not depressed, but it's just the whole idea of having a possibility of seeing Jisung hurt. "Anyways, but if I ever did that... I would've never met you" Carmen said getting back on topic. She gave a slight hug to her remark which made me smile a bit. When I first met Carmen she wasn't the most friendliest. Hell, we both had no luck with friends. I was completely new to the school, and she was a complete bitch. Yes I love her with my whole heart, but she was a bitch. Wasn't her fault though. Her parents showed no compassion to one other, so it seemed only regular to her. It took forever for her to open up, and it wasn't until we had a sleepover one night. That night we cried our eyes out talking about our personal demons and traumas. "Yeah, yeah, whatever" I say slightly hugging her back. 

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I want to leave. I want to leave. I want to leave. Was all I could think. I couldn't and didn't want to focus on the rambles that left my teachers mouth. I just sat there keep my head on the desk trying to zone everything out. "How'd you get those bruises?" I heard Diana ask a little too loudly. God it would be better if I was deaf. "Jisung. How'd you get those bruises?" she asked again as she obviously didn't get her answer beforehand. "Why does it matter to you?" he asks back in a monotone. "I'm just wondering" she says defensively. "Well stop, and mind your business" he replied with the same tone. Everything about the conversation made me feel sick to my stomach. You're less than that. It just kept floating around in my head. With it came the flashbacks of his glare. It looked cold. I popped my head up and immediately raised my hand. "Ma'am can I use the restroom?" I ask which she seemed kinda startled by the request, but other wise nodded. 

Everything was clear except mentally. After I looked in the mirror for a good minute to stall time, I got tired. Instead I was now just aimlessly roaming the halls. Not even thinking, but rather just walking with no purpose. Until I turned the corner and saw a familiar face. Chenle. Shit. As I did a 180 I was stopped. "Kaya" I heard Chenle call down the hall. Great. Am I in for another degrading moment. "hey" he said approaching me after jogging lightly down the hall. "hey" I replied softly as I didn't know what was happening next. "What's wrong? You seem almost scared of me" he said chuckling but I couldn't bring myself to chuckle back. "I'm not scared of you" I reassure which he nodded, he had a concerned expression. "Anyways we didn't get to see Friday, or we did but very shortly" he said. "Oh yeah I called off. But I don't know if you'll be seeing me as much anymore" I replied pretty much staring at the ground. I didn't know what else to do. "Why? Is it because of Jisung?" he questioned once again having that concerned expression. But not of pity, but of annoyance. "Don't worry about it's fine" I say trying to just turn the subject around. "Hey look although he can be quite an ass sometimes, he does have some compassion" he suggested. I wanted to roll my eyes, but held it back. Compassion? Compassion my ass. "Yeah, when I find it I'll let you know" I say moving to cross my arms. "I never said he wasn't asshole, but he does have emotion" he replied almost as if it was a reminder. "But anyways I'm heading back to class" I say changing subject as we exchanged waves and parted ways. 

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"The day just feels annoying" I complain to Lindsey as we sat the counter of the Diner. It was coming sooner to closing and I was counting down the minutes. "Why you guys just sitting around?" Ron asked in a cocky tone as he exited the kitchen. I'm mean if you looked around you would notice NOBODY IS HERE. "We've had no clients for the past hour" Lindsey explained as she toyed around with a paper napkin. As boring as it was I now saw an opening. "Ron I need to talk to you" I said basically springing up from my seat. I could here the deep sigh parting from his lips. "What do you want?" he asked as if i was biggest bother in the world. "I want official days off" I stated which he laughed in a mockery. "Yeah no" he replied starting to walk away. "Yes. It's law that I'm given 1 day off for the 7" I stated. He turned around and returned a dirty look. "Hell no. I don't give a shit if you want days off" he replied. "What if I reported it?" I questioned trying to find an angle. "What if you reported this?" he retorted sticking up his middle finger to me. I swear to god this dude is a child. "Fine then I guess I should report sexual harassment on workers, and a minor" I stated in a bold tone. At that moment everything went quiet. Lindsey seemed stunned that I had the balls to confront him about it. Ron himself seemed a little taken back for a second before his expression changed to anger. "Get the fuck out! You're fired you damn bitch!" he said screaming at me. My anger must've came at a full front because it all went to my mouth. "Alright great. Now I don't have to deal with a low life of a manager that has to prey on employees and minors to actually get some action. So if you wanna call anyone a bitch go look in the mirror and yell stupidly at yourself" I screamed back. I didn't even clock out, but just walked out. As I walked down the sidewalk I could hear shouts coming from the diner. It was muffled, but most obviously Ron. 

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What the fuck as I going to do now? Like what the literal fuck am I going to do? If I report him, it won't get my job back.