Stories From A Private High School

Concerned Drunk Cheese

A/N if you are reading this, please tell me your favorite story so far, and why.

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I was sitting next to a friend at high school retreat talking to her about the amazing changes we were seeing in our class, when our Bible teacher walked up to us. 

"Am I interrupting anything important? Because I can ask you later Anna." he asked 

"Nope. Just chatting." my friend answered for me. 

He nodded "ok... Anna, were some guys picking on you today during the games?" 

I looked at him from the corner of my eyes, eyebrows furrowed.  

"I though I saw some guys picking on you. Were they?" he asked genuinely concerned for my wellbeing. 

"Umm... nope. Not at all. Nope, definitely not. Thanks though. I really appreciate you looking out for me." I smiled, but was still confused. 

He smile back "If they were, just tell me and I will take care of it. Savvy?" 

"Aye!" he walked away and my friend gave me a confused look. 

I shrugged my shoulders "Don't ask me! I was picking on some guys, but they weren't picking on me. They were just laughing at themselves because I was pointing out the truth!" 

(Senior Year)

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Rae was side hugging me and had half her coat draped around me. I was literally freezing my arms off thanks to my Holly Golightly, Breakfast at Tiffany's, costume and she was trying to keep me warm as she walked me to Ella's car. It just so happened that Rae is about an entire head taller than me and we were both slightly crouched over. She was dressed as a flapper girl and had a large feather in her hair. Due to my costume I head a very large bun type of structure on my head. As we walked, we happened to catch our shadow on the garage. We looked like a creepy monster with four arms. Since it was the only logical thing to do, we immediately made our hands look like claws and started growling.  

This sent us into gales of laughter and bending over holding our stomach. Once we had gotten past the area we could see our shadow we stopped laughing for a minute. Immediately I stumbled over air and almost pulled Rachel over who started laughing obnoxiously. Soon we were acting like we were drunk and stumbling to Ella's car. Singing at the top of our lungs became our top priority, but at the exact same moment we stopped and screamed "BASKETBALL" then looked at each other and almost fell on the ground at how funny that was.  

By the time we reached Ella's car, tears were streaming down Rae and my face. Ella just looked at us and shook her head, giving Rae a hug and getting into the driver's seat. I continued laughing as I got into the car and fastened my seat belt. The last I saw of Rae that night was of her dancing away while shaking with laughter (I think that is why she was shaking.) Someone must have spiked the punch that was in the garage because Rae and I were definitely acting drunk and Ella had a major head ache the next day and had to skip church. Those Christian Halloween Parties... just kidding. We just stayed up past our bed time and had our normal symptoms of being exhausted.

(Senior Year)

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"I'd like six pounds of cheese please." I stepped up to the lady at the counter the meet and cheese counter.  

She looked at me with a slightly surprised face, but nodded. "What kind?" 

"Uhhh..." I hadn't been given specifications on types so I hesitated looking at the variety. "How about two pounds of provolone, two of Colby, and two of Cheddar? Can you do that?" 

The nice lady simply nodded and I stepped back as she went to slice the cheese. My classmate, Jonathon, stepped up to another lady working at the counter. "I'd like 13 pounds of meet please." 

Again the surprise look appeared, but she was too nice to comment. "What type?" 

"Four pounds of roast beef. Four pounds of turkey. Five of Ham." his deep voice answered. After our almost twenty minute wait, we finally had our order and the next two classmates in line stepped up.  

"I want six pounds of cheese" Kimberly told the lady as Louis said the other lady "I want thirteen pounds of meat. The ladies finally broke their polite demeanor and looked at each other and then back at my classmates. They then started laughing. 

"You're kidding! Hahaha!" 

"No. we're not." 

"Yes, you are! Haha!" I think our insanity was rubbing off on them 

"No. we really aren't! We are trying to feed fifty of us over a six day period. Two more people are going to ask you for thirteen pounds of meat and two more are going to ask you for cheese. Six pounds of cheese and thirteen of meat is only one lunch for all of us. The other meals we have to figure something else out." Louis explained. The ladies finally understood that we were in fact not joking and went to cut the desired meat and cheese. As soon as they had walked away, we couldn't stop laughing. If only they knew that at another counter people were asking for 30 pounds of bacon and we were buying loaves of bread by the cartful. It was a very eventful day at the grocery store in St. Louis for us, the other shoppers, and the workers.  

(Junior Year)