Ego's Trap | ✔

44 | Thinking and Overthinking

In general, a lot of things made me lift an eyebrow about what he had done, but the world didn't give me enough time to respond. A whole minute, or even an hour, wouldn't have been enough for me had the world given me that. Lucky for me, I didn't need to respond, either. Roger reads people exceptionally well, and it's been a fact since day one; a fact I refused to accept before my hunger for change 'cause I failed to see myself as a monster. I had no choice but to accept that now though. I have been given the wake-up call of a lifetime── Ane, with the stabbing, Teresa, with the serum, and Roger, with his priceless support and solid sage vibes. I could not be any more grateful.

Once Roger got back to his regular level-headed self, he clenched his jaw and sighed.

"Sorry, Jade. I didn't mean for it to come out that way, it's just... well, you're here so that I can cook something for you, to play board games and watch movies together. I'll drop you off at the hospital at eight o'clock. Sounds ordinary by universal standards, doesn't it? Not for you. It's odd for you, isn't it?"

"What?"

"You're here so that you can have some sense or feeling of normalcy," Roger said, now on his way to the front door. I followed him from the paved path, watching his feet avoid stepping on flowers and wince at the grass they hurt in return. "For the latest quarter of your life, and even before that, you've been missing it. You haven't had the chance to grow and bond with others healthily, you haven't had the chance to breathe, you haven't had the chance to be in a safe space that allows you to mold yourself into whatever you want to be. People have taken advantage of you in the worst of ways, but as I have said before, you can still live. That's why you're here today. You need it, and trust me, you'll thank me later. So no, you're not here for sex. Never. I mean, unless you sneak someone in here that's around your age for yourself── and even then I don't want minors doing it in my house."

There was something warm about his words. I couldn't place a word on it, but my eyes stung. "S-So it's not a safe space for sex?"

"No, not for you. Find a room elsewhere."

"Oh come on," I moaned, clenching my hands. Deep inside, I was holding on to something. Something that stung, yes, but something warm, too, that made my throat stuffy. "Don't... Don't fuck with me like that! Please?"

"It's a hard no, kid."

A few moments after some more of my bitching and moaning, Roger opened the door to his home and turned over to me, stepping aside and motioning for me to go in. There was a welcoming smile on his face that once again felt weird from someone like him. It was a warm smile, similar if not exactly like the one he made when I told him I didn't want to be under the code and Oath of contract killing; under the control of my alias; Blossom, and all that they stood for. Roger's smile was warm, welcoming. Like── if not exactly── the one he made before kissing the top of my head and promising to always and forever be by my side. Weird it was, yes, but so very warm. So very welcoming. A smile from the Reaper. No, a smile from Roger, the one person that is miraculously incapable of hating me for bringing him down to hell and instead wants to help me out of it.

A smile from Roger, the noble, self-sacrificing, stupid hero with a cape. Warm, welcoming, and weird.

Beyond the door, there was nothing but coziness and calm. The walls from beyond the door were a light, soft shade of brown. There were no portraits of people on them, but there were a couple of paintings and sketches relating to nature, aside from sappy embroidery pieces from, most likely, his mother. From outside, I was already able to spot the first bit of furniture: a recliner. It beamed right at me, just like its owner. A lamp stood next to it, waiting to brighten up the room and my day. Everything seemed fluffy in there, in his home. I couldn't help but to look behind me. I mean, I had to. I didn't want to look at Roger or his house or anything within it for long. The sting in my eyes grew stronger. It all felt warm, too warm.