When They Were Gone

How will we get around it? - III

His hands gripped together, planted steadfast in front of his face as he stared at the blank, white wall. He shouldn't go. He should avoid ever seeing her again, he should refuse to do anything that would potentially put him in any more danger. He should stay and wait for everything to pass, make sure he wasn't suspicious for the next few days. And, if he did that, everything would go away and he could return to his job, his work in peace.

A shaky breath. No, if he waited it out, something was sure to happen. He would be easier to track her down and-

Why on earth did he make such a stupid mistake?! Revealing so much to someone he didn't know... What was he thinking?! And then, eating so much he threw up... What was happening in his brain?! 

He sighed. And yet, however much he told himself to do the smart thing, the safe thing, he'd already gotten dressed and readied himself to go. He looked down. Long pants and a blank t-shirt with a jacket over the top. Certainly not the standard issued clothes. No, his were taken from high-middle class storage. How? He had a few contacts in the higher areas that tended to have those clothes laying around. 

What would the camera operators think if he wandered around in something other than his standard, issued clothes?

Another sigh, he stood, turning to his normal wear and beginning to change again.

No, he shouldn't be going. He shouldn't be getting ready in the first place. He'd told Devin something other than what was shown on the records. He'd said he was visiting a girl he liked. In the records, he had no romantic attachments or any hints of futuristic romantic attachments and he had clarified that only a week or so ago. By what he said to Devin, it was obvious he'd been meeting someone much longer than a week, especially because he'd recently had little to no time to meet anyone because of the continuous stream of work. The continuous stream that had given him barely enough time to sleep.

Yet, he was somehow at the door, opening it and walking out in his issued clothes.

Was he going to work? That didn't make sense, he was heading in the opposite direction. 

Why was he walking so fast? His worried thoughts had kept him holed in his break room for too long, so long that even if he ran there, he would still be late. That didn't keep him from trying.

A smile overtook his face as he moved faster and faster towards the park and, therefore, the meeting place. Doors, walls, space passed him. A knot holed up in his throat, excitement creating bubbles of air around his vision, concentration keeping that vision from deterring. 

At each thump of his foot across the floor, his heartbeat picked up until it was racing. And he was jogging. And he was running. And then he was through, surrounded by fake trees and plastic grass. Yet, his feet kept moving towards the place his mind always ventured. The strange yet fascinating girl who caused his reckless heart to flutter at just the thought of her name. 

What was he doing? What was he doing!? He shouldn't be going anywhere near her, he shouldn't allow himself to be caught with her!

And then it did matter.

His awareness grew, returning to the present as he realised the giddied expression of his face. He forced a neutral resting face, slowing his footsteps and changing his posture as he bent his back and once more resumed his usual downed and serious image.

What was that!? I'm just... I keep digging myself into a deeper hole... Just stop, relax. If you're going to see her, you better make sure the rest of you remains composed. You may be able to quench suspicion yet... Clearing his head, removing thoughts of Pea from his mind, he walked through the park, slow and steady.