Purgatory - a transgender adoption story

Cars and Conversations

Free.

I'm free.

Free from my nightmares. Free from my past. Free from the hellish orphanage that kept me captive for two years of my life.

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What would've taken a normal couple a few months to complete, took Josh and Tyler about a week. They're probably crazy, but I can't say they aren't dedicated. They spent long hours here with clipboards, making calls as they filled out form after form and too many questionnaires to count. They said they were going to get me out of here, and they did just that.

Josh and Tyler helped me out to their car after letting me say goodbyes to those I might miss. Unsurprisingly, the only person that got a hug was Mrs. Leo, world's most bipolar orphanage caretaker. After I hugged her, I just left. Left forever.

Tyler hopped into the driver's seat while Josh and I sat in the backseat. We both wanted a pillow to sleep on. But I couldn't sleep. I can never sleep.

My mind drifted off as Josh fell asleep on my shoulder. What if they actually don't want me? What if this is just for publicity? Will they send me back, or will they just forget about me? And what if they make it so I can't transition? I can't be stuck like this forever. I can't live like thi-

"Whatcha thinking about?" Tyler's voice sliced through my thoughts.

"Nothing much."

He didnt seem to believe me "Well you're breathing was starting to pick up. I was just checking on you."

"Ok, well I'm all good"

"We won't abandon you, if that's what you're thinking" he looked back at me through his rearview mirror. I could tell he was concerned about me.

"I know." I smiled and Tyler did too. We were going to get me through this together. All three of us.

Slowly but surely, I drifted off to sleep, my head falling on Josh's. I heard Tyler laugh a little as the two of us sleeping on each other in the backseat of a squished car. I watched as scenes ran across the backs of my eyelids. An old foster mom. Spencer McDaniel. Myself walking up to a new house with a black garbage bag full of clothes. I watched as little random scenes from my past danced across my vision. Then I saw them. Josh and Tyler's smiling faces with their arms open towards me.

It wasn't the usual nightmare. It was nice. I wasn't being screamed at. My mom wasn't kicking me out. The boys wanted me. They wanted to give me their affection. And I ran towards them, hugging them tight.

Then I woke up with a rarely genuine smile. Josh had long since woken up since he was the one driving, and Tyler was sitting in the passengers seat, chatting to his fiance. They were cute. It really did seem like they were in love.

I shifted in my seat a little, bringing Tyler's attention to me "Hey, Kiddo!" He smiled "We're almost there."

"Ok."

"Say, what were you dreaming about? At first you seemed scared but then you were smiling and everything." I pressed my lips together, thinking.

"At first it was a bit of a nightmare but then I saw you two. You were waiting to hug me. It was nice." I smiled a bit at the memory of the dream.

"Good."

We drove for a bit longer before Josh pulled the car into the driveway of a nice looking house. Holy shit, we're there.