Doritos (Lashton)

Outerspace/Carry On

"It's getting really late, and as much as you may want to stay, perhaps it's best if you got some rest and came back tomorrow"

Luke's eyes cast up to the nurse, visit blurred from his tears. He stared down at Ashton, unrecognizable on the hospital bed.

He was pale and lifeless, the only indication of the fact that he was alive being the slow rises and falls of his chest. He was so small and frail, and Luke desperately wanted him to wake up.

He'd fainted hours ago at school, and Anne had left only an hour or so ago, because she needed to go home and explain to Harry and Lauren what had happened. She hadn't wanted to, yet her only reassurance was the fact that Luke would be there to watch over her baby. And even if she wanted to keep Harry and Lauren from hurting, they had to know.

Ashton might not survive.

Michael, Calum and Luke's whole family had came in as well, before leaving with Anne, seeing as she needed the comfort and support. Luke could've used some, however he'd managed to convince them to let him stay with Ashton.

"He's going to be alright, love. You ought to go home and rest, come tomorrow when you're fresh. He must care as much for you as you do for him, and he wouldn't want you losing yourself. Part of helping Ashton includes taking care of yourself."

"H-he needs me. I didn't e-even notice he was slowly dying, I-I just-"

"We don't always, and I guess that's how it sometimes is. My sister, only last year, died from suicide...she um, she overdosed"

"M's-sorry...do you think A-Ash is g-gonna...pass?"

"That's not why I told you, I wanted to tell you because I know how you're feeling. I'm working a night shift, and I promise you, I'll watch over him and make sure he's ok."

Luke nodded and shakily hugged her, muttering a thank you. She rubbed his back, before, silently leaving. Luke stared down at Ashton again, before he gently leaned over to kiss Ashton.

His lips brushed against Ashton's, before he picked his jacket off of the chair. Luke reluctantly stood at the door, not wanting to leave. He swallowed thickly, before he reached into his bags side pocket.

The nurse passed by the room again, and Luke held in his hand to indicate 5 more minutes, and she agreed, giving him a small smile. Luke dragged the chair closer to Ashton, and tore open his bag of Doritos, gently picking one out.

He brought it to his mouth and held it there, before he took a bite, and quietly chewed the chip.

"I love Doritos Ashton. T-they're delicious and y-you always ate them with me. Y-you never turned one down"

He ate another, desperately wanting Ashton to respond. Luke took a shaky breath before he continued talking, eating another chip between sentences.

"I should've k-known. I-I should've f-fed you m-more Dor-Doritos....I h-have t-to to go b-baby but I-I promise I'll be back. W-with Calum, a-and Mike, and Anne, Lauren, Harry...and even my own f-family. My d-dad accepted me, a-nd he loves you just as much as my mom does. A-and tomorrow, I want you to get up for me...a-and I'll ta-take you out. Y-you'll be ok"

Luke cried quietly to Ashton, and when he only had one Dorito left, he placed it beside Ashton's bedside, with a small sticky note.

Want a Dorito?

Luke kissed Ashton's forehead, and made sure he was tucked in well enough, before he left, broken hearted.
*****
Luke sighed and shut his eyes, restless. He'd slept for about 3 hours, and now was impatiently waiting for the clock to hit 7 so he could wake up everyone else and go back to the hospital. His phone rang a few moments later, and he picked it up, mumbling into the device.

"Hello?"

"Luke, sweetheart, is this you?"

"A-Anne?"

"Yes dear, sorry if I woke you up"

"No, I couldn't sleep anyways"

"I figured...you have to make sure you're taking care of yourself...I can't risk you either Luke, you're like Ashton to me, you know that right?"

"Y-yea. Don't worry about me, or Ash...he's going to be ok..."

"Mhm...listen, I'm taking Harry and Laur to the hospital a bit later, I'm letting them get as much rest as possible...would you stay at the hospital till then? I think they need someone closer to their level, and knowing you and your brothers may help, because you guys already sort of connected, but if you're family doesn't want to stay that lo-"

"I don't know about them, but I'm going to be there as long as possible and I'll talk to Ben and Jack. There's an age gap, yea, but they love Lauren and Harry. I understand it must be hard for them"

"They're scared for him"

"I-I'm so sorry Anne, I didn't even notice"

"Luke, you can't beat yourself up over this. Whatever happened...we need to just be there for Ashton, and I promise you, you are one of the best things that happen to my baby, and I'm so happy your in his life. He-he cares about you a lot"

"I care about him too...so much...thank you for talking to me, I didn't know how much I needed it. I'll be there for Lauren and Harry"

"And we're here for you. Now, try and rest a little bit. I'm always here to listen ok? I'll see you later"

Luke hung up the phone and cried into his pillow.
*****
Liz made sure everyone was awake and at the breakfast table at the same time, knowing Luke needed the comfort. Luke was silent, but he still ate, finally speaking up when he was finished.

"Will, um, you guys be coming to the hospital also?"

"Of course Luke, beyond your boyfriend, Ashton's important to us too"

"Anne called. Sh-she asked if you guys would be there when she brought Lauren and Harry, because they're scared...she said they could use comfort from us"

"Poor children, they must be worried...we're going to be there as long as Anne needs us. Ben, Jack, Andy?"

The other three had been silent up till that point as well, and Luke was scared they didn't care as much, but when he felt his dads comforting arm around him, he knew they'd be there.

It made him happy, knowing there were so many people who cared for Ashton, he only wished Ashton knew.

Luke leaned into his dad and let a few tears fall, before he shot a quick text to Michael and Calum, telling them to hurry.
******
Luke was the first one up to Ashton's room, and he sighed when he saw everything as it was, including the chip he'd left. Luke found his usual seat beside Ashton and leaned over to peck his cheek.

He didn't know what to say. There was so many feelings, so many emotions bubbling inside of him...so many things he didn't say. Luke knew words were best when they were sung, with raw emotion, so Luke lowered himself best he could next to Ashton, before he quietly sang.

"I can still taste the ocean...."

Outerspace/Carry on.

The song meant everything to Ashton, and so it meant everything to Luke, and part of him singing it was to reassure himself, that it was going to get better. It would. For him, and for Ashton.

"You know it's gonna get better, you know it's gonna get better"