Assassin, until the first moment (🇬🇧)

The morning after

Alec tilted his head back and closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of the hot water on his skin spraying gently from the showerhead above, while outside the world fades away.

The weather hadn't calmed down since he was rudely awoken during the night, he could hear the rain still falling, battering relentlessly against the windowpane in the bathroom. He dove into last night's memories and a smile appeared on his face when he was recalling the kiss he and the assassin had shared. Alec brushed gently with one of his fingertips over his mouth and he could almost feel the ghost of the assassin's soft, warm lips on his own again. He must be insane, fantasizing under the shower about a kiss with the strange man - a hitman to be exact.

Alec shook his head, astonished that he hadn't broken down yet, considering the situation. It would probably scare anyone else to death or they would at least be panicking already, but he wasn't doing any of that. He was surprisingly calm, just like he was in that moment last night when the assassin had come to kill him.

Alec shut off the water and climbed out of the shower. Steam swirled around his naked body and covered the mirror above the sink with an opaque coating of fog. He grabbed one of his big fluffy towels and wrapped it around his waist. Scrubbing a second towel over his head to dry his hair, he went over to the sink. Alec wiped the condensation off the mirror with the palm of his hand and studied his reflection. He looked tired; he hadn’t been able to get back to sleep after the incident.

His gaze darted towards the thin red line right beneath his chin where the sharp blade of the assassin's knife had grazed his skin. Alec knew that he had barely escaped being killed last night. He was asking himself for the hundredth time this morning, why the assassin hadn't killed him but kissed him instead. He swept some strands of his damp dark hair off of his face while further questions made their way to the forefront of his mind.

There were questions which should probably be more important to him than these, which were drifting through his mind the whole morning. Who'd like to see him, the Duke of Alicante, dead and why? And will there be a second attempt to fulfil the failed mission?

He was so deeply caught up in his own thoughts that he recoiled when he heard the door of his apartment open. That was the moment his body went into full panic mode. His heart started to race like crazy, pounding painfully in his chest. The toothbrush, he'd just reached for, fell down onto the floor. His throat tightened uncomfortably and the oppressive feeling took his breath away. Alec holds onto the edge of the sink for dear life, trying desperately to still his shaking hands but he fails. Blood rushed into his ears painfully and that's why he didn't hear someone calling to him.

He cursed inwardly. Was he having a panic attack? Alec closed his eyes and tried to get control over his breathing, but it didn't work. Suddenly he felt a light touch on his shoulder and he jumped in surprise, turning around in a flash he stared at the astonished expression on Jace's face.

"Is everything alright, buddy?" Jace asked, with worry on the tone of his voice.

Alec still had no control over his breathing and could not answer. He shook his head with his eyes wide, panicking; he avoided Jace's gaze, who was seriously studying him.

"Hey! Please, look at me." Jace seemed to realize what was happening immediately, he took Alec’s hands which were trembling uncontrollably. "Try to calm your breathing, okay?"

Alec could feel the burning in his lungs and how they tried to pull air into his body. His mind was racing fast, thoughts whirling around his head. He had nearly been killed. Someone wanted him dead. Someone commissioned an assassin, a hitman to kill him. Who? Why?

"I can't," Alec muttered barely able to speak.

"Yes, you can, Alec. Inhale and exhale. Slowly. Breathe with me."