All That She Holds

Chapter Twelve

I watched as the rain poured hard outside my window. I shivered as the draft blew in. It was cold and depressing outside. The perfect description of how I felt inside.

I knew what would happen when I got on that plane. I knew what I was doing would be dangerous. But it was only suppose to be dangerous for me. I was stupid to think that no one else would get hurt.

I moved away from the window and sat on the edge of my bed. I kept seeing her face every time I closed my eyes. I haven't slept. It's been three days. Everyone keeps coming to check on me since I've been holed up in my room.

At this point all I do is cry and question everything. It was suppose to be me. She wasn't suppose to die. She wouldn't have even been there in the first place if she didn't feel the need to get away from me. It was my fault. My head and my heart wouldn't let me forget it.

My door opened. Nova stepped in and crossed her arms.

"Get up, get dressed and let's go."

I shook my head. "No Nova I-"

I didn't even finish my sentence before Nova walked over and pulled me out of my bed. "Take a shower and get dressed. I'm giving you fifteen minutes and then we're leaving."

She pushed me into the bathroom. I was about to protest but the look on her face made me stop. I sighed and did as she asked.

Fifteen minutes later Nova and I were at a graveyard standing before Stella's grave. I couldn't breathe here. It was like the air was being pulled out of my body instead of in.

Stella
Beloved Friend
July 19, 1985 - October 5, 2019
Those who don't believe in magic will never find it.

"Why are we here," I choked out.

"Talk to her."

"Nova's she's gone."

"Exactly. You have to move on. So talk to her."

I looked back at the tombstone. I closed my eyes and took a breath. I got on my knees.

"I am so sorry, El. I didn't want this."

A tear fell down my face. "You weren't suppose to die. You were suppose to be here when we came out on top. You were suppose to keep teaching me magic. You were suppose to live."

The rain padded softly on my jacket. I wiped my tears away and stood. "But I won't let your death be in vain. This world is sick. I'm going to heal it. This world deserves peace and I'll get rid of anyone who stands in the way."

I reached out my hand and made white daisy's grow around her grave. They sprouted tall and beautifully. I looked up at the sky to see the clouds began to part. For the first time in three days I felt the warmth of the sun on my skin.

After visiting Stella, Nova and I went to get brunch. We sat at a small table in the corner. I sipped my tea as we waited for our food.

"Thank you," I said.

She shrugged. "You needed to take a shower."

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah yeah. This was a wake up call. I needed this."

I took Nova's hand in mine across the table. "I'm going to be strong. I have to be. I wasn't strong for Stella and she paid the price. I won't let that happen to anybody else. Not T or Nessy. Especially not you. Never you."