The Worst Drug

•Old Habits•

        {•Unedited•}
                           ~Vina's POV~

        "Is he okay?" My mom asks, gesturing with her head towards Idris. He's sitting on the couch nodding to whatever Nava is saying just as he's been for the last fifteen minutes. My dad has his eyes narrowed at the side of his head, which confuses me since they get along well. "Ever since he came in he's looked a little flushed."
"I'll talk to him," I tell her. She takes the semi-wet rag and finishes drying the dishes she used to cook. Straightening out my skirt, I walk to the couch and sit down beside him. My mom wasn't kidding about him being flushed in the cheeks. Nava turns the conversation over to my dad, thankfully taking my dads attention off Idris. "Are you feeling okay?"
"Y-yeah, I'm fine," he says. Just as in about to take his hand I notice the cuff of his right sleeve undone.
"Has it been like this the whole time?" I ask, fixing it for him. He's silent for a few minutes before clearing his throat.
"Must have been. I got ready in a rush and probably forgot." He quickly takes his arm back after I'm done, clasping his hands together on his lap. He turns his attention back to Nava while I keep mine on him. His eyes are droopy but not as they had been a few hours ago or the other day, it's worse and his pupils are constricted. I try not to pay too close of attention to the way his fingers tap against his knuckles.
     His eyes squeeze shut as he rubs them, taking slow breaths. I scoot a little closer, throwing my arm over his broad shoulders and resting my head on him. He sits back, creasing my wrist with his hand. My fingers run down the back of his neck and through his hair slowly, trying to notice if there's anything else about him I can catch. His eyes flutter close just as my dad reaches over and claps his hands in front of face.
     He finches back at the noice giving him a very forced smile. Alaric starts laughing at his reaction while getting up. "Help me with something outside," my dad tells him. Liking my way, I take my arm away from around Idris and let him up. As the two of them walk outside together I can't help but feel a little sick to my stomach from nerves. Idris isn't acting like himself which worries and confuses me and I have no way of figuring out what's wrong if he doesn't communicate.
     "Everything okay?" Atticus asks as he sits down in the recliner. Clearly throat, I nod. He's the last person to vent to. He'll give his opinion too strongly and put down yours.
     "I'm okay."
     •••••••
                           ~Idris's POV~

       I feel sick as I follow him out to the front yard. He stops in his tracks once in front of a white truck, turning to face me. His expression is far from what it was inside. In there is looked laid back but now he looks ready to beat my ass if I make a wrong move. The wind blows hard, the trees going crazy with every breeze.
       "You might be fooling them, but I know heroin when I see it," he says, tilting his chin up. My chest tightens with anxiety. It's harder to hide than I remember. When Vina noticed my cuff being unbuttoned I nearly ran right then. I feel shitty disowning her trust by using it against her. She'll believe what I tell her because I've never lied to her before, it's coming in handy now but I wish I didn't have to use it to my advantage.
    I want this day to be over with only the memories of this morning but that's impossibly. I'll now remember this day as when I relapsed. If I had done this to myself I think it would be easier for me to handle, but I'm also freaked out that I had no idea and was tricked. If it weren't for Ozais I would be inside having the first good Christmas of my life with my girlfriend and her family that's so kindly welcomed me, but because of him I'm out here, high and hardly able to comprehend what's going on with Zavian.
      "I don't know-"
     "Don't give me that shit, Idris. I was addict, I know all the fake promises and sayings in the book. You know what I'm talking about. You didn't go out to your truck to make sure it was locked, you shot yourself up."
      My eyes drop to the grass. It's wet from the gloomy weather. The sky is still grey from yesterday and it will probably rain. My distracted thoughts are interrupted by him slapping me softly, hard but not enough to actually hurt.
      "I get that being fucked up is hard, fucking trust me, I know," he says, his jaw clenched. I pinch the tip of my nose, looking anywhere but him. If anyone could have noticed my behavior I'm thankful it's him and not Atticus or Alaric. "Vina loves you, I can see that, and you love her. Why the fuck are screwing that up?!"
     "I-I'm not. I just...I-I just had to get through today without being too obvious," I tell him. His eyes narrow but not in a way that he looks mad, just confused.
    "So then tell me how you're going to get through the next few hours when you come down and tomorrow when you start feeling a withdrawal. Hmm? How are you gonna get through it?" He asks. My eyes lift to his, finally meeting his disappointed gaze. "I believe in you, but you have to understand that Vina is my daughter. This is going to hurt her if she finds out. And you know what? If something happens to her because you get too wrapped into this bullshit then I'll take your ass out before the drugs can."
     He takes his keys out of his pockets and presses a button. The white truck makes a loud beep to signal that it's been locked. "Are you going to tell her?" I ask, scared of his answer. Vina means the world to me, loosing her would send me completely down hill. Doing this is risking what we have but I can handle it, I can get it under control again; I still am in control.
     "No, that's not place. The only way it'll leave my mouth is if I have to tell her I killed you. Either you clean yourself up or she'll catch on eventually. Your choice what road you go down."
    ••••••