Destroying a Monster (Xavier)

Consuming Pain

                                   
Seriously cried listening to this song (come wake me up-rascal flats) and writing this chapter

                                      Xavier

She was gone. My Angel was gone. I'd never hold her again. I'd never smell her again. I'd never feel the joy of seeing her smile in the morning. I went to go home but I couldn't open the door. I couldn't walk into that house if she wasn't on the other side of the door waiting for me. I closed my eyes and I could see her face. I could see her smile in my head and suddenly I felt tears in my eyes.

The pain consumed my entire body and suddenly I felt tired. I turned away from the house and started towards the town. I walked to the bar and sat down. The bartender said something but I couldn't hear anything. A drink was put in front of me and I took it willingly.

Soon I felt dizzy and looked up noticing the seven empty glasses in front of me. I heard laughter behind me and instantly turned. It was her. I shook my head looking back shocked then she was gone again. I turned back to the bar.

"Xavier." Her voice whispered. I looked around  and no one was there. I was hallucinating. "I love you, Xavier." Her voice said again. Pain twisted my chest and I threw the glass I was holding.

"Stop it!" I demanded at the voice. "Please, stop" I felt tears on my face. I got up needing air. I threw money on the bar leaving. I walked away from the bar looking down the empty street.

"Xavier!" I heard her voice again. I turned and the memory of her running up to me that night with my wallet flashed in my brain. I remembered that night so clearly. Touching her face having her close for the first time. I shook it from my head and walked on. Before I knew it I was in front of the coffee shop. I looked in the window where I could see late night people still on their computers or reading. I looked at the register and saw her there she was smiling at me. I closed my eyes tightly then looked again. No one was behind the counter.

"Stop it, Angel! Stop doing this to me!" I fell in the chair outside shaking.

"Xavier, it's going to be okay." Her voice was so clear, I felt like she was right beside me.

"I need you, Angel. Please come back to me!" I pleaded I didn't bother trying to stop crying now. "This is all my fault. You're gone because of me. I can't live this way. I can't live in a world where I don't see you."

"I told you I'd never leave you."

"How can I be with you now, please, Angel, I'll do anything to be with you again!" Her voice was gone. "No! Come back, please don't leave me."

I woke up the next morning outside the coffee shop. No one was on the street and the sun wasn't even up. I looked at my phone it was 4am. I glanced at the store and that pain again twisted in my chest. I couldn't do this I couldn't see this place any more. I walked over to the window throwing the chair I had been in, through it. The glass shattered and I stepped in over it. I walked into the shop to the kitchen. Her memory pushed back into my mind and it burned me. I walked to the stove and broke the gas line. I turned and walked out. When I was outside I looked back at the shop again one last time. I pulled out my gun and shot it off towards the kitchen. Seconds later the back of the building exploded. I turned and left as the fire grew.

I got home and again I froze at the door. I stood there not being able to walk any closer than the first step. The door opened and Eric and Chase saw me.

"Come on," Chase said stepping towards me. I stood there looking at the house then at Chase.

"I can't do this. I'm not strong enough to live without her."

"Xavier, what are you saying?" I stepped back off the porch turning towards one of the bikes.

"Where are you going?" Eric called.

"They took everything from me. I'm going to do the same."

"You can't go there alone! They will kill you." I looked over them.

"I don't care"