Dear Ryan Diaz

Chapter 25: Grief

I officially arrived to the hospital, waiting for maybe a possible chance that my mother could have a chance to wake up. It's what I hoped, but deep down I didn't believe it. I didn't have faith in myself that she was going to make it out of this hospital alive. I was urgently waiting for the doctors to at least tell me something, whether it was good or bad news. I felt hurt and irritated. I had to at least maybe call one person to get here and let the guys know. I took out my phone and dialed Tia's phone number.

Tia: Hey, Carter. W-
Carter: Tia...
Carter: I need you to get to Johnson's Hospital.
Tia: W-Wait, the hospital? Why? Is everything okay?
*Carter's Thought Bubbles: Is she being serious?!

I inhaled and exhaled as I tried my best to consume the air. Tia sounded so confused. I can imagine seeing her with a worried expression, while pressing her shirt between her two fingers, nervously. One was the thumb and the other one was the index. I informed her what happened, but I didn't tell her specifically everything. I just said that my mom has been shot and I know for a fact that the anonymous person was the one that did this. I didn't tell her about the text message yet mainly because I wanted everyone to directly confront me in person, so that way maybe I can determine on the looks of everyone's faces who's lying and who's telling the truth. I told her to bring the guys and the girls too.

Tia: Holy shit, Carter! I'm so sorry.
Tia: I'm gonna call them. Hang tight.
*Carter's Thought Bubbles: Screw you!

Is she honestly sincere with her words? I know I shouldn't be such an overdramatic person with major trust issues over my best friend, but... does Tia genuinely care about me? If she doesn't, then I don't need her support. I can't imagine if she was the one who called the cops because she did, then this is all her fault and she'll be the one to pay for it. But deep down in my heart, I was trying to ask myself... did the anonymous person lie? I mean, if this person did, then what is the reasoning behind on attacking my own mother and my fucking brother? Where is all of this coming from? Why require all of that sufficient time on going against me? Who's doing this? So many questions were running through my head and I desperately needed answers for it. I can't control it. I'm so impatient and I need to know. This is an urgent matter to me. Ever since Ryan died, it has been nothing, but a vicious war. It was filled with torture and death. My life hasn't been at ease as I begged for it to be. All I could feel was hurt and anger. The hurt that I've been feeling was like an infection. My heart had suddenly escaped out of my chest and was laying, flat down on the ground. I felt like it has been stomped repeatedly and I had to watch it. But it wasn't just me watching it, I could also experience the pain.

Back to Julian.

Julian's POV.

I arrived home just about two minutes ago and I was planning on watching Netflix. Carter wouldn't take back any of my calls, so I sent her a message saying to please call back whenever she is able to. She's probably doing something busy right now. Maybe she's working on something for school or anything else. As I was this close to watching "The Office" someone was calling me. I thought it was Carter, but when I checked my phone screen of the caller's name, it was actually Tia. I picked up and decided to speak.

Julian: Hey, Tia. What's up?

Tia was suddenly talking so fast. I couldn't understand what she was saying. She was running out of breath, I could hear her footsteps, rushing to a place that she urgently needed to go. I can imagine her behind the phone, looking worried and upset. Something was going on and I could tell that it wasn't good.

Julian: Woah, woah, woah, Tia. Slow down. Take deep breaths.
Julian: What's going on?

Tia listened to what I said as she took a moment to relax herself and was patiently waiting for herself to explain everything. After that, she explained everything and I was truly devastated. I felt crushed and shattered by hearing this. I could suddenly experience my own heart breaking into pieces.