L.O.V.E.

Chapter 14 - Roone

I decide to give her space and return to the kitchen. To keep myself busy, I put together two sandwiches, which look too delicious for their own good. I'm starving and so must she. Stalling, I mend my voice and try for a different approach instead.

'I mean, how are you feeling? You had quite a few drinks last night. Your head must be exploding.'

Maybe this will finally break the ice and ease her mind. I know last night wasn't exactly a breeze, but still. Tired, she takes a deep breath and cuts directly to the chase. Her shoulders jump up and down as the words are escaping her inert body.

'Why would they take her? I don't understand.' She asks in a low voice, then suddenly pauses.

Anxious, she traces complicated patterns throughout the room, unaware that she's gripping and squeezing her upper arm. From time to time she combs her hands through her hair pulling it upwards and mumbling out incomprehensible sounds. After just a few seconds, too long for both our sakes, she turns to me, her face covered in despair.

'She has never broken the law. She's always done what she had been told. Why would the troops take her?'

I won't be able to ever forget those big tearing eyes, piercing me as she waits for an explanation. All the unanswered questions that have piled up until now are making her nervous. Stressed, she's chewing at her bottom lip again, although this time she's biting it too hard. I should give her some answers before she hurts herself.

Closing the distance between us, until we are just a few inches apart, I lift my hand to caress her face. My eyes are glued to her wet bottom lip, while the urge of wiping off a stray tear from her cheek is consuming all of my restraint. My heart aches for her and I can't believe how much I let myself care. It's useless to keep lying to myself, but then again, my annoying conscience decides to infringe, stopping me before I do something I'll regret. I saw her reaction when I'd touched her earlier. Instead, I settle to look her in the eyes, one is a clear boundless sky, the other a wild and luxurious reef.

'I didn't know it until after I had seen the room.' I start, yet I refuse to break the stare. There is something in those eyes that keeps me coming back to her.

She pulls back, holding me in place with her hands, and creating a barrier between us. I should take her hint, but when did I ever give up so easily? Mission comes first, still, she's nowhere near what I thought she would be. I watch mesmerized as her lips are moving apart and prepare mentally for the rain of questions she must be holding back.

'What? What do you know about Susan?' Nerissa cuts me off impatiently, a flicker of hope crossing her eyes.

I clench my jaw and take a deep breath. I should make something up and fast, yet my gut tells me different. Maybe hearing the truth is what she needs right now. Although what I'm about to say might jeopardize my mission. No one knows about the Iron Guard except the government, of course, who covers everything up. However, I have a feeling that they have already been up to their necks keeping the rebels from interfering with the experiment.

I walk to the fridge and take out a bottle of water, weighing very carefully how and to what extent I should be revealing the truth. The consequences of my decisions could be either devastating or helpful with my case. I throw the bottle to her and she grabs it in mid-air. I've been stalling this moment since she stepped foot inside the depot, but I came to the conclusion there was no easy way to tell it.

'Come with me.' I say, and then I head over to the hatch in the roof.

She obediently follows me outside on the ridge, squinting her eyes at the sudden bright light. A gush of wind sets her auburn hair winding in the air, as she seats confused on the rugged metal slope.

'Look,' I start and mend my voice for a short tick, 'what I am about to say is government secret, hugely restricted and very dangerous. You are in jeopardy just for knowing their name.' Oh boy, I really hope I am not doing more harm for letting her know the truth. Well, a part of it, at least.

'Tell me everything, please. She's all I have left.' She begs, her eyes drenched in tears.

Here it goes. I puff and shift my stare towards the sky. I don't want to witness the damage to what I'm about to say.

'It was the Iron Guard.' There, I said it. 'They are extremists who are under the virus influence. Their plan is to "free" the people by eliminating the inhibitor from their body, and to overtake the city. The Supreme Government is erasing all their deeds and cleans-up all their trace. The last thing they want is to deal with a scared and unstable city.'

A few seconds pass and the only thing to break the silence is her water bottle rolling down the roof. We both watch it fall over the edge when her words finally hit me.

'And you know this from your parents?' She asks, having a hard time believing me.

'You can say so, yeah.' I lie, still looking up. The sun has not started to set yet, but the moon and a few stars are fighting for their spot on the infinite blue. 'Although, they are not my real parents.' I continue, surprised for the slip of the tongue. I have no idea why I said that.

I catch her staring. Those eyes are too big for her beautiful face. Her cheeks turn red and she quickly moves her glance to the city that unravels in front of us.

'Saying that all of it is true, what does it have to do with Susan?' The moment when the connection of the harsh reality kicked in, her voice jumped a whole octave higher. She must have realized the threat Iron Guard was posing to her grandma's life.

'I haven't figured that one out yet. From the mess they'd made in your house, it looks like they were searching for something. Do you know what it might be that they are looking for?' I add, really gambling my luck with this one.

I don't want to push it too far and raise suspicion. It's good that I gained her trust by telling her the truth, although I am not sure yet what she is going to do with all the information. Nerissa shakes her head puzzled and lost. She must be terrified and I am the last person that should comfort her.

'What is that?' She asks out of nowhere, her trembling finger pointing towards the brightest star in the sky.

I look at her speechless and amazed, yet before collecting my words, she cuts in.

'You keep looking at it. I thought there must be a story behind your curiosity.' Her voice is hoarse from crying in silence. Her hands are busy rubbing and twisting as she's waiting for a distraction.

'That,' I say, 'is home. My mind always wanders to its magnificence and finds clarity when it needs to. There is something that draws me to it like I am connected to it somehow, but I can't explain what it is. Maybe I am a part of it and my whole essence looks for ways to return.' Home, God I miss that place.

I reach for my hand and try to capture it between my fingers. Terra 2, the brightest star the skies can bear. Then, my eyes shift to the small tattoo on my wrist, reminding me of why I am here. I stretch the sleeve to cover it, but her piercing gaze is too disturbing.

'Let's go inside. I'm starving.' I change the subject while catching her staring again.

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