Unexpected future(Yoongi×Reader)BTS FF [COMPLETED]

Chapter 3

Y/N P.O.V
     As a gift for Graduation,your parents brought you a ticket for a BTS concert as well as one for a fan sign.You were very happy and you hugged your parents,trying to hold your joy tears back,before you could run into your room and started to cry.
     Even though....you didn't think about your emotions and how you were going to control them....
     
       *Flashback-when you were 14*
     You were in your room while listening to BTS' music."First love" by Yoongi came in your playlist.You suddenly stopped reading since it was a very meaningful song because of the lyrics-in the first place-,but also because of the soft rap of Yoongi,that made you melt;this song had had a hard impact on you since the first time you read the lyrics and everytime you listened to it you started crying.
     But sometimes it was different,
sometimes you felt your heart aching like never before.There were times like this when you stayed stuck in your room sobbing and trying to understand your childish feelings.
     You couldn't understand why you felt like this when you were just a 14 years old teenager.You couldn't understand why you felt like this for someone that you didn't know,for Yoongi. And you didn't want anyone to know about this because you knew no body would understand,even you couldn't understand.....
     Still this feeling was so confusing- one day being so strong and letting you cry with puffy red eyes that you hardly hid and other days almost nonexistent.
                               ***
     These months were very hard for you until you learnt how to calm yourself down and hide your feelings even from yourself.You tried to forget about these immature feelings for Yoongi,the one who made your heart beat faster because of his sweet gummy smile,because of his lyrics,because of his personality,because of him himself.You tried to forget all of these,knowing that it'll be impossible even to meet him and say thank you for his influence that helped you in difficult situations.
     You finally forgot about it by decided that it's the best for you to just gave up on it and listening to BTS just like you listened to other artists-with not so much interest;even if deep inside of your heart you knew that once you became an ARMY you can't help it but feel that BTS is part of you,of your heart,soul and life,the best part that helps you to not give up on what you want and what you think.
     But you just chose to not mind the feeling of guilt that built up inside of you when you decided to not listen to BTS as you used to.It was hard at first,but after a while you got used to feel that guilt and,from your perspective,it was safer and easier because you were afraid of the other unknown feelings,that used to haunt you a little time ago.
                    *End of Flashback*
      You remembered that times when you seemed to be like a loser who doesn't face herself,her feelings and soon the joy  tears transformed into tears of sadness,anger?Even you didn't understand the mixing feelings.
     You started to throw your things on the floor,you were angry and upset at yourself.
     You couldn't handle it anymore...the feeling of...guilt...the feeling that you ignored all these years...was now growing in your heart...in your soul...and it hurt,it hurt o much.
     You felt like you didn't deserve your gift.You couldn't support the idea of going to the concert of the boys that helped you to not give up on your dreams,but because of a stupid feeling that you couldn't understand you gave up on them,turning your back to them,not only to them,but to the whole family they struggled to build:ARMY;you couldn't support the idea of watching in their eyes and putting on your face a fake smile.
     You just couldn't handle it and ended up ripping the tickets and throwing them into the trash bin.
     After that you took you money that you earned for years,bought a flat and moved in there without any explanation to your family,even to your friends;you just wanted to be alone...

A/N:Hope you enjoyed the chapter,it'll get more interesting in the next chapters.Byeeee!💜💜💜