Chapter Twenty-Three

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Josie’s P.O.V.

The ride back to the hotel was silent. We said absolutely nothing to each other; this feeling was so unnatural. I had no idea what was going through his mind for once and maybe it was for the best because I didn’t even know how to manage my mind at this moment. I know we were going to see each other again, but I never thought that I’d feel this shitty about having to leave him. I didn’t know how I was going to do it. I’ve been so accustomed to waking up to his blue eyes in the morning and now it not going to happen for a long time. After the tour, the guys were planning on going home to spend time with family which I was completely supporting. They deserved it. They deserved a break. But it also meant more time away from each other

"We’ll be arriving at the hotel in ten minutes," The driver spoke breaking the silence for a second before it returned to the deep quiet accompanied by the sound of the car moving

Luke and I were sitting on either side of the car as far as possible from each other. I didn’t know how we ended up like this, being close to him reminded me more and more about the fact that I’d have to leave tonight. I was staring outside of the window as we passed by random landmarks from the town we were in when I felt Luke’s warm hand being placed on the inside of my thigh like he usually did whenever we were sitting next to each other. I glanced over to him finding him staring out of his window as well not moving his head to look at me but keeping his hand in the same spot. Those were one of the things I loved the most about him, the small gestures he did to make sure that I was really there with him, that I was still with him; he always seemed to need to have assurance that I would still be there when he woke up so he kept me wrapped up in his arms whenever we slept which I had no problem with. But it was hell, he knew that one day I could just walk out of his life for good and not even take a second glance and I knew he could do the same to me, but that’s the thing about love, you put all your trust into the other person, trust that they’ll be there when you wake up to say their raspy good morning to you as you let out a yawn and they pull you closer to them never wanting to let you go. Moments like these are what make me believe that my definition of love is true. Luke made me believe in love again. Crazy right? 

I unbuckled my seat belt and scooted to the middle of car next to him as he tucked me in under his shoulder keeping me close. This time I was the one with my hand on his thigh as he kissed my temple

"I don’t know how I’m going to leave you tonight," I whispered closing my eyes like my body was trying to reject the words coming out of my mouth. I wish I never had to say those words at all, but we were both thinking it regardless

"I don’t know how I’m going to be able to let you leave tonight," He countered holding me even tighter against his body

I snuggled my face into his neck trying to take in every second I had with him and kissed his skin letting his scent sink into me as if this would be the last moment I’d have with him. It wasn’t for forever, but it would be a long time until I’d be able to see him again. You’d think that I’d be used to leaving people because of tour, my entire lifestyle basically, but it gets harder and harder every time because things change, people change, and if you’re not there you never know what will happen. Those were the unfortunate things I’ve learned during my long time away from home. When things are going good, you feel like things will last forever, but of course that’s never the case. There’s always one speed bump that’s going to make or break your decisions, and this was ours

"If you make me stay, I won’t fight back," I hinted trying to find any reason to not leave

"Trust me baby you don’t know how bad I want you to stay, but I can’t do that," he sighed

"You’re too good for me, you know that?" I asked looking into his eyes

"I’m pretty sure it’s the other way around, Josie," he let out a small smile before placing his lips on mine

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