Jegulus Oneshots

Nightmares and Sirius

People always say that hate is a strong word but so is love and people throw that around like it's nothing.
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A rumour circulated the school.

James Potter finally got Lily Evans to date him.

At first, Regulus dismissed the rumours to be false. James was in love with him.

Right?

James wouldn't do that to him.

Right?

Regulus avoided James at all costs as seeds of doubt festered in his mind.

He skipped all his classes and snuck into the kitchen late into the night for food and early in the morning for breakfast.

He denied that rumour with all his heart, ignoring his brain that said it had to be true.

People like James Potter don't love people like Regulus Black.

That's just how the world worked.

Any hope he had left diminished as soon as he turned the corner one late night to find them together, holding hands, smiles wide on their faces, he backed away and went into the nearest classroom, slumping down to the ground in shock. It couldn't be true. There had to be an explanation.

Right?

A few hours later, he was staring out a window in a quiet corridor at the grounds below, trying not to think about James.

Movement caught his eyes and he looked towards it. His breath caught in his throat as he saw Lily and James walking hand in hand along the worn path to a bench. The pair sat close and James slid an arm around Lily, pressing a kiss to her head.

Tears brimmed his eyes as he looked at how happy they were together. At how happy James looked. James was happy.

Happier than he would ever be with Regulus.

And that tore him apart.

Regulus never was good at dealing with emotions and he supposed it had something to do with his fucked-up childhood.

So anger overtook him.

He sighs, standing up from the ledge he was leaning against, the image of the couple burning in his mind, and ran to his dorm.

He blamed the world for making him and James so different that it hadn't worked.

He blamed his parents for raising him in the way they did.

He was angry with James for tricking and lying to him just as everyone else had.

But most of all he blamed himself. It was all his fault. He didn't deserve someone as perfect as James Potter.

All this rage and self-destruction consumed him.

Anger was his fuel as he tore apart his dorm room in a blind rage, breaking everything in his room.

Everyone else was at dinner or out in the beautiful weather on picnics and whatnot so there was no one to witness the breaking of Regulus's heart.

He tore apart his room until he came upon a tie.

A Gryffindor tie.

James's tie.

He could physically feel his heart shatter as he gazed upon the gold and maroon tie.

He broke into sobs, falling to his floor, clutching the tie near his forever breaking heart, and curled up into a ball on the floor.

Sobs wracked his entire body as he laid there, memories flooding through his head. Memories of them together. Memories of a time when he was truly happy.