She Who Was My Love (girlxgirl) (Book 2)

From The Grave

Faith's POV

So... what do I do now? How do I go on like this? Having to live without her. Living without her love, her touch, without the feeling of knowing what's right and wrong. I mean, I know what Buffy would do. And I know that what Buffy would do is the right thing but... why? What would be the point? Why do I care about right and wrong? I cared about Buffy and she was taken from me. Everything that ever means something to me gets taken away from me. My mother, my watcher... Buffy. They're all gone and nothing will ever bring any of them back to me.

So what's the point? Why should I care about anything ever again? It'll just end up leaving me. So what do I do now? How do I go on living without someone as incredible as Buffy? How do I live without her beauty to wake up next to every morning? We only had a few short moments together but for me, every moment was a lifetime. Knowing I will never feel that way ever again... it hurts.

It hurts more than I can say. I was ready and willing to die to make the pain stop. But things are different. Willow stopped me from doing something that. I realize now would've been monumentally stupid. Buffy wouldn't want me to die. She'd want me to live, to keep fighting, and keep saving the world because that's what B would do. And because it's what she asked me to do... for the good of the world.

But part of me still has to ask... why? Why should I do something that will cost me everything I care about and eventually my own life? God everything's so screwed up. I don't want to die but, I don't have any reason to go on living either. I wish you were here B. You'd know what to do.

Willow's POV

It's almost midnight.

"Are we ready?"

"I think so, Will."

I've got everything I need.

I've got the urn in front of me at the edge of Buffy's grave, it's filled with the blood of the mother and Anya, Xander, and Tara are forming the circle of life at this very moment.

"Okay, light the candles."

They start to light their candles and I take a deep breath.

I've got to concentrate to make this work.

I hear a lighter flick several times.

"Anya what's wrong?"

"It's this god damn lighter, it's not working."

"Well make it work, it's almost time."

"I'm trying I..."

The lighter finally works and Anya lights her candle.

"I got it."

"Okay, we can start then."

I dip my fingers in the urn's blood and paint a cross on my forehead with it. I put a line on each cheek to complete the first part of the blood ritual.

"Osiris, god of all things lifeless. Hear my call... return to us the one we seek."

My skin starts to feel like it's burning off as the energy flows through me.

"Feel our pain. Give us back our savoir, the one for whom her lover weeps."

Then something hits me, like a sword through the gut, making me lurch forward. Something starts crawling up my arms, just under my skin which makes the burning worse.

"Osiris... here lies the warrior of the people. Let her cross over."

Oh god... the test, it's happening.