The Nerd and Ms. Perfect

Chapter 3 - Blurry

Sprinting through the woods soaking wet in the middle of the night is much more painful than you would think. I would trip and fall, get covered in leaves and dirt, wipe myself off only to fall another time.

I make it to Narnia, have a seat and then my real thoughts begin haunt me.

Why aren't you popular Matthew?

Why does she like a jerk like him and not you, Matthew?

It's because your average, everything about you just average, you're just you, Matthew.

I slam my fist.

You're a nerd, just like they say you are, Matthew.

No one loves you Matthew, even your best friend won't be seen with you in public

Everyone's embarrassed to know you Matthew, you'll never be good enough.

I slam my fist harder.

"God damn it!" I yell, standing up with a tear on my cheek.

I hear leaves moving behind me and turn around.

It's Danielle, your 'best friend' Matthew, she probably laughed with the rest of them.

HAHAHAHAHAH You're so pathetic Matthew, she just pities you.

What a waste of a human you are, Matthew.

I run to the back door of my house and step inside, locking the door behind me. I listen for my mother's voice, but don't hear one. I go into the kitchen and see a note, "Out with the girls, don't wait up. - Mom"

Relief flowed through my body like an avalanche. I hear the door bell ring, I look up and my heart drops. I forgot she was out there for a second. I ignore the ringing and run up stairs, grab some clothes, and get in the shower. I turn the water as hot as it goes and watch the dirt run down my skin and down to the drain.

Numb.

I sit down and let the water wash away my filth while I stare blankly at the faucet. I can't take this anymore, I can't take this 'secret friendship'. I can't stand these people... I can't stand Dan...

Sigh.

I can't let my feelings go, why... Why do I still feel this love in my chest, how can I still feel this way for her?

I turn the shower off, sit back and stare at the ceiling. 

God damn it.