bells • namkook [discont.]

blank

A/n: 300 reads!! Hsjajsbbahh TYTYTY

One word to describe how Jungkook was feeling was blank. He didn't know what had happened, and part of him doesn't even believe it.

He hadn't talked to Namjoon for a few days after the incident, no matter how much Namjoon reached out to him. In all honesty, Jungkook was scared. Scared that someone so sweet as Namjoon, could be so cruel. It was a trigger to his past that he thought that he had left behind. And the worst part of it all was that Namjoon didn't even seem to care.

Jungkook had started staying over at Taehyung's place more often. He wanted to tell someone about his incident, but it was hard. The words wouldn't want to come out of his mouth, it's like there had been a lock placed over his mouth.

Taehyung had seemed to notice that something was off, Jungkook was a giggly boy who wouldn't be afraid to speak up most of the time. Taehyung hesitated to reach out to his best friend namely because he knew how much the younger liked to have his own space.  But maybe this was the only exception.

"Jungkook," Taehyung softly called, knocking on the younger's door to his bedroom.

Jungkook opened the door with a sigh, not completely disheveled. But it was clear to see that the boy had been crying a lot, due to the red tint in his eyes and the slight bags under his eyes.

"Yeah?" Jungkook asked, sniffling a little and coughing a bit.

"Have you been crying?" Taehyung furrowed his brows, as he placed his hand on Jungkook's shoulder.

"No..." Jungkook replied softly, slowly feeling the growing lump in his throat. He choked out a small sob, soon turning into tears spilling out of his eyes continuously. Taehyung's eyes widened and immediately wrapped the younger in a hug.

"You want to talk about it?" The elder had asked, to which Jungkook slowly nodded his head. Taehyung continuously rubbed his hand on Jungkook's bank, hoping that it was soothing.

The pair sat down on the chairs that surrounded their small kitchen island, Jungkook awkwardly shifting on his chair.

Taehyung softly spoke, "You know, you don't have to if you want to..."

The boy shook his head in response, a hefty sigh escaping his lips. He explained to Taehyung everything with Minhyuk and how he thought Namjoon was just really touchy that night. Jungkook gave a long pause before explaining what had almost happened in Namjoon's bedroom. He also explained how, Namjoon didn't seem to be listening nor how he had a complete attitude change.

"So that's why you guys haven't been talking." Taehyung mumbled, placing a hand on top of the younger's.

"I think you should tell him."

Jungkook had looked like a deer in the headlights, immediately shaking his head exasperatedly. Continuously saying, 'No! I can't do that' and scolding Taehyung for even bringing up the idea in the first place.

"Jungkook, I'm going to be brutally honest with you. Do you really think someone as sweet as Joon would do that willingly and sober? You ever think he thought you were someone else, or could've not been in the right mind. I completely understand, it's no excuse for what he did, but he may not even realize what he did in the first place unless you tell him." Jungkook contemplates a bit.

"He just seemed, so— so different, but at the same time himself. I don't know..." Jungkook says after a minute or so.

Taehyung knows he has no say, so that's where he leaves it at, hoping Jungkook made the right decision. Taehyung didn't know the whole story with Jungkook's past, but it probably had to do a little bit with why the younger was not reaching out to his boyfriend.

***

It's been a couple days since the talk. Jungkook returned home from his classes, making sure not to see his boyfriend—or whatever he was— no matter what.

The boy stares at his cellphone, finger swiping through text message conversations with Namjoon. Hesitantly, he calls the contact, inhaling deeply before putting the device to his ear.

He waits several seconds and hears an exasperated voice.

"Kook! Oh my gosh, are you okay?" It sounds like the elder had been crying for some time now due to the nasally voice he hears.

The boy feels nervous, scratching his neck as he speaks, "I'm okay. Not the good okay, just the okay okay. We need to talk."

Jungkook hears sobbing on the phone, "I'm so, so sorry. I'm so stupid. I won't ever do that, never. I promised you I would wait, and I wasn't even in the right mind. What was I doing? You don't have to forgive me, not now, not ever." Namjoon chokes out between sobs, feeling so guilty at the mess he had made.

Jungkook stutters, "I, uhm, I think we need to talk in person... How about later this afternoon?"

Jungkook doesn't hear much other than crying, so he hopes Namjoon thinks the invitation over.

A/n: As of now I'm very sorrowful for the death of Cameron Boyce. He was one of those people that I continuously grew up with in my life, and seeing someone pass away as young as him, is so unreal. I can't even imagine what his parents feel or they have to live without their most precious thing in the universe. I give my condolences to Cameron Boyce and his family, and I hope he rests in peace. You lived a good life Cameron, but died too young. ❤️❤️❤️