Feed the Muse: Inner Monologues (Vol. I) [√]

[ you as my love language ]

I loved you when I was fourteen. With your mop of brown hair and your boyish smile, and your coltish youth, you swept my heart in a cascade of feelings that I mistook for simple adoration. Like a king, you brought me down to my fragile knees until my lips could taste the bittersweet earth that came with your laugh. I loved you then, and I love you now.

I loved you when I was sixteen. It's been two years but a trail of broken hearts have shown themselves on your doorstep, each one bearing a name of someone who has fallen victim to the fathomless deep that are your eyes. Like an enigma, you kept on pulling and luring me in until my lungs choked with the onslaught of emotions rising from my chest. I loved you then, and I love you now.

I loved you when I was eighteen. Love was in full bloom, and my poor heart took its third beating when you told me, "let's stay friends". You were falling in love, I was falling apart, and it was such a lifelong classic tragedy that my hands ached to rid myself of the embarrassing cycle of unrequited love. Like a thunderstorm, you struck me wide open with your bolt of reality, electricity zapping through my bloodstream like a deadly disease that only forgetting could cure. I loved you then, and I love you now.

I loved you when I was twenty. Our paths took us far apart, and I was thankful for the ocean that separated us. Some say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, and I knew it right then when 6 months later, you showed up in front of me with your mop of brown hair and your boyish smile, and your coltish youth, saying "it's been a while". Like a meteor, I came colliding with the realization that I was not over you yet. I loved you then, and I love you now.