Ecdysiast || PJM 🔞

Chapter 37: Reunion to Death

"Who are you?" He asked, his vision still not-so clear because he had just woken up.

"Dawon. My son," Mr. Lee said softly, bowing his head low to be near Dawon's face. He rubbed his eyes to clear his vision then stared at the man who called him son. Yangwon smiled, seeing Dawon finally awake. "I'm your dad, Dawon." He cried but Jiwon just silently cried as he watched her father feel happy because he finally met them again. She's still mad but she won't deprive Dawon the chance of meeting their father after so many years. He might probably don't remember anything about him anymore because he was such a small child back then.

The man helped the boy to sit on his bed and Dawon started crying as soon as he was showed the family picture that they last took before their life became a mess. "Appa?" The young boy cried, looking directly into his father's eyes.

"I'm sorry," Mr. Lee immediately apologized, pulling his son into an embrace, his heart feeling warm and complete after being able to finally find his children. "I owe you so much, Son. But this time, Appa will pay for everything that he did wrong and make them right. I'm really sorry, son. You will let appa be a good father to you, right? Will you give me the chance?" And the boy nodded, making the man smile brightly.

"Just like that? You think I can easily forget how you abandoned us and now you are coming back in our lives again? Why did you even come back?!" She yelled. "Am I just a joke to you?" She sarcastically laughed. "If you think I can forgive you and leave everything behind, you're wrong."

Jiwon couldn't take how Dawon easily accepted their father again after the boy nodded happily before they hugged each other. She just couldn't easily forget her past and how he abandoned them. She became a stripper because she needed to be one for a huge amount of salary and now, she even made herself a gold digger because he was helping him pay for Dawon's treatment. She lost her dignity because of poverty. She suffered because of him and she hates him for that since she is the one who is mostly affected by her father's mistake.

"Jiwonㅡ" she ran out of the room, not letting her father finish his sentence. She decided to go on the rooftop. She lets the cool wind blow her hair as she ran while crying until she reached the railings. She screamed loudly to the top of her lungs, also holding the railing tightly. "Why did you have to come back in our lives?!"

She cried. "I fucking hate you so much! I hate you! You made me like this! This is all your fault!"

"You're letting this family fall apart just because of that bitch?!" Jiwon heard her mom scream and cry inside her parents' room. She was just going to drink milk to sleep nicely for the night until she passed by their room and heard her parents arguing.

"Appa's leaving us?" Her voice cracked. She didn't want to eavesdrop and interfere with the elders' argument but her family meant so much to her. She slowly opened the door to peak and saw her father putting her mother's clothes in a luggage while her mother brings back the clothes out.

"Yes, I am, Jisoo!" He pushed his wife who was trying so hard on begging for him to stay. "Just look at you. You're too plain and boring unlike before!"

"It's because I gave and submitted myself to you and our kids! Because you are my priority, Yangwon! You're acting so childish! Grow up, you're not a teenager anymore to be searching for sexy ladies and all! Why did you marry me in the first place? Huh?! You recently just met this stripper or prostitute or whatever the fuck is that person and now, you're going to waste our fourteen years of marriage just because of her?!"

"Yes, I will. You can be both if you just chose to be, Jisoo. I'm a man and I have my needs too!" He sighed. "Just sign the papers and leave this house."

"Yangwon!"

The man sighed. "Fine, I'll do it for tonight, but I don't want to see you here when I get back tomorrow. Leave the annulment papers signed when I get back."

"What about our children? You're being so selfish, Yangwon!"

"Keep them if you want. I don't care." Jiwon's father exited the room, taking Jiwon aback after her father glared at her, catching her eavesdropping. Her father just then passed by her, not even talking to her and it broke her heart even more.

"Appa!" The young Jiwon ran after him yet he wouldn't even look back. "Appa!" She cried, running and running until they were already outside.

"Appa, don't leave us please! I love you!" She begged and tugged on his shirt after finally being able to reach him, crying and sobbing. "We need you, Appa. Don't do this!"

The man stared at his daughter coldly and he pushed her, hard enough for her to fall down on the ground yet the man didn't even feel a single hint of guilt or pain after seeing his daughter desperately making him stay. "Bye," was the last word he uttered before going inside his car and leaving.

Under the dark, cold, and dreary night, she watched his car zoom away from her as her heart slowly crushed into pieces.

She remembered the day when everything in her life started to be in chaos and that day was when he left and abandoned them.

"I'm a joke." She bitterly chuckled. "I don't deserve to be happy at all. I hurt Jimin, I'm hurting Chanyeol while I somehow became a gold digger too."

"Even Dawon doesn't need me since he has our father now." Tired from running and crying, she fell down on the ground.

"All my life, happiness is just what I wanted to feel. I found Jimin, but I'm stupid and I let him go. I guess I'm not worth loving after all."

"Sorry can't save me now. I'll be selfish for once and this will be the last." All along, she only thought of the welfare of others before herself but she's had enough. She is suffocating so much from everything.

"I'm fucked up." She bitterly laughed. "No one really needs me anymore." She stood up after moments of crying as she became tired of it. She stared down the building which was a ten-story building and saw how high she was from down the first floor where she could see a great view of the whole city. "I'm disgusting, useless, and worthless."

Carefully, she positioned herself just on the other side of the railings. Holding tightly on the railings behind her as support to not completely fall yet, she looked back down to see how high she was from the ground. She's scared, but suicide being the only way for her to finally rest from all the pain that she had gone tired of feeling, it seemed inviting for her. Without anymore hesitations, she closed her eyes. "I'm tired." She sighed. Her tears were flowing hard like river. "I'll miss all of you, but I'm not sorry," she whispered and with that, she slowly sets her hold free from the railings, letting go of the support that she only had to not fall and die.