Predatory

Where's My Epic Background Music?

Knocking Aphelion out was the easy part, dragging his unconscious body out of the bathroom discreetly into our kidnapping van was an altogether different feat. It was even trickier due to the fact that Helex, Tarn, and Tesarus were all in completely different places and could be of no use in dragging the small but heavy mech down the hall (Tarn was doing something with an overly busty green femme, Helex was playing bartender, and Tesarus had to be left behind because his acting is terrible and his agility is even worse). This made thing tricky, as I, the ballerina, had to carry him on my own, because his arm alone would have crushed the itty bitty Vos, and Kaon was apparently allergic to physical labor.

I hefted the rose gold mech onto my shoulders, and huffed in effort.

"Honestly Dread-Dread, this isn't that hard. Just throw him over your shoulder honey." Kaon mumbled over a sip of something pink and bubbly out of a champagne glass. 

"If it's that easy why don't you carry the dead-weight, smart-aft." I snarled, as I re-adjusted Aphelion. 

"Ugh," He took another sip and held the glass out with one hand, resting the elbow of the same arm on his hip. "Please, I don't do the whole, exercising thing. Mama ain't got time for that." He shuddered and wrinkled his nose in disgust. 

"Lily-livered son of a-" I mumbled under my breath as I trudged down the hall. Vos offered no help, though part of me began to wonder if he was stronger than he let on, "Real charming, you boys really know how to help a girl out don't ya?"

To this Kaon tutted, and flashed a blindingly white grin, "I know, we give great morale support and really help ya'll become strong independent femmes who don't need no mech." He took an obnoxiously graceful sip innocently.

I glared at him, standing perfectly postured, with perfectly manicured servos, and a sleek freshly waxed paint job. Meanwhile I was hunched over, a body on top of me, and I was unfortunately covered in vomit from the unfortunate said body, with chipped paint and covered in sweat. 

"I hate you so much," I gritted my teeth and continued down the hall.

"Please, honey, you know you love me. I'm freaking adorable."

Vos made a gagging noise, "You're blind, you wouldn't know freaking adorable if it came up behind you and slapped your aft."

Kaon narrowed his eye sockets, "What did you say, munchkin? Sorry, I don't speak idiot."

I grinned, I might be doing all the work but at least I got to watch Thing 1 and Thing 2 bicker. That almost made this assignment worth it.....almost.

***********************************************************

When we finally made it to the van, and got Aphelion inside, the news of his disappearance had spread like wildfire and every newstation at every greasy diner and bar was broadcasting the situation. Lovely.

Thankfully we hadn't been spotted, Kaon had rigged every single camera on our route to see nothing. Still, it was unnerving to be hunted for.

We had just slammed the van doors, when a ghoulish scream pierced the smoggy air.

All three of us whirled around, scanning the empty streets for any sign of the cause.

The screams began to get louder, and turned from screaming to crying, when suddenly a small femmeling, who couldn't have been older than four, ran around a corner towards us. Tears were streaming down her face, one side of which was red and aggravated. A slap mark, no doubt of it.

She ran smack into Kaon, took one look into his empty optical sockets, and collapsed into tears, hugging his legs like they were her last tie to life itself.

"Hey hey hey, what-uh, whatcha doing there munchkin?" Kaon asked, he awkwardly bent down and patted the little blue helm that was shaking against his legs.

"There-There was-There was a mech and-and he grabbed my arm and-and he said he knew, he knew where Op-Optimus Prime was, and-and he was gonna show him to me, and then, and then I screamed, and he slapped me, and and and-" Her little shin wobbled, and her eyes flooded with tears.

"Hey! I uh, see ya found my cousin. She ran off when I was watchin' her, I'll just be uh, taking her," came a wheezy voice from the end of the alley. 

A mech came into view, a bottle in one hand, the other moved to grasp a light pole when he stumbled. He was quite clearly drunk. Two mechs came up behind him, laughing far too loud, and apparently friends of his. One glanced at me and slid hid tongue over his lips.

Kaon froze, then he turned slowly to face me, then he glanced at Vos, and we all nodded at each other. 

"Darlin', Optimus Prime ain't here at present," I said, standing up to my full height and stepping in front of Kaon as he picked the little femmling up and held her against his chest. "But I don't think he'll mind if we fill in."

Kaon slipped out of the alley, and murmured, "How about we go get you some hot cocoa, then find your carrier alright? Do you know where she lives?"

"She lives in a castle on a hill, she's a pwincess!"The little femmeling said with a big toothy grin.

Kaon's smile faltered slightly, "That's, that's very helpful munchkin."

The little femmelin suddenly frowned, "Who's screaming?"

"No one important," Kaon muttered briskly, rapidly searching for a nearby cafe.

**************************************************************

After Vos and I were finished wiping the energon mostly off of our servos, we got to work on moving the only important body, (it was also the only one that still had all limbs intact). 

Helex had commed and said that he would recon with Kaon and see if they couldn't find the sparkling's home. 

Tarn hadn't said much, and we had all sent him a message, he had replied with one word. Wait.

Helex had laughed, and said that Tarn knew exactly what he was doing, personally I thought it looked a lot like a mech going off with a femme to go do something I would personally rather not think about. But I decided to hold off judgement, besides, he was an adult, he could do what he wanted. Who was I to stop him if we wasn't doing something relevant to our mission?

Vos and I managed to haul Aphelion all the way to the ship in one piece, and get him inside of a cell with little to no difficulty. Then we marched upstairs for some well deserved warm energex. 

When we reached the kitchen however, we found Kaon bouncing the little femmeling on his knee while she nibbled on a cookie. Helex sat across from them and the two were muttering in low voices.

"Why is she....why?" I asked, glancing at Kaon.

"We couldn't find her mum, and it's a bit late to be going around knocking on doors asking if anyone's lost any babies recently. We have extra room, our ship is safe, and Tarn loves babies, so it's not like we'll get into trouble."

"Alright," I said with a shrug, and that was the end of that.