Last Christmas, my husband and I bought our two daughters 1 Direction concert tickets and last night was the concert here in San Antonio. Nine months my daughters, mostly my oldest one, counted down to the night I would take them to their first concert. I was looking forward to taking them not only because they love the group but I thought it would be neat to be the one to take them to their first concert.
But fate, as always, had different plans for me. Last week I became sick and I have been in bed ever since. Went to the doctor on Thursday and she told me it was a sinus infection and gave me antibiotics. I am still in bed. So I had to find someone to take my girls. I will never have the chance to take them to their first concert.
My fear here is that I will forever be stamped in their mind as the mother who was always in bed. I'm in bed a lot, whether it be for a sickness or just my depression. This has truly depressed me even more. I am missing so much of my kid's life. I can see my future. I will die in this bed. I don't want to but I am always sick. I have more worse days than better days. Right now my chest hurts and I can barely breathe. I pray everyday to feel better, for God to lay his hand on me and heal me, please.
