If Only (18+)

Chapter 4

Her remark reminded me of who I was. I'll always be the lying, cheating whore who never loved her boyfriend because she couldn't keep her legs closed enough.

Before I could hear his reply, I ran out of the classroom as fast as I could.

~~~

Sitting alone in a bathroom stall in an abandoned, old school building, I took out my MP3 Player, put in my earbuds and began to listen to my music in peace.

The beach waves crashed against the sand, soaking my feet.

The sky was a cloudless blue. The sun rays kissed my skin, and I felt the wind blow through my hair, smelling the fresh breeze of the ocean.

Further down the beach, my brother was laughing and racing his friends into the water. I smiled, reminiscing the feeling of peaceful bliss.

Behind me, my parents sat in matching lawn chairs, holding each other's hands. I sat down, wiggling my toes in the sand. With my index finger, I drew small hearts.

Looking at my parents, I smiled at them. 

I saw my Mom. She was young, radiant, and beautiful. She was the diamond you found in a pile full of rubble.

I've missed her so much. There were so many questions I wanted to ask her, so many things I wanted to tell her. 

If only-

I was suddenly jerked out of my daydream when I felt someone tap on my shoulder. 

"Young lady, aren't you supposed to be in class?" The janitor asked me, hauling some cleaning equipment on a trolley. 

"U-uh yes, sorry sir." I awkwardly apologized, and got up from the dirty floor and walked out of the building.

"Hmpf." I heard the janitor reply before I exited the old bathroom.

As I walked through the old corridors, I wrapped my earbuds around my MP3 Player and safely tucked it in my backpack. Since I didn't have much money, I traded a kid two sticks of gum and a nickel for his MP3 Player. 

Although it wasn't a fair trade, he told me not to worry about it too much. After that, we began to hang out in the park, and he would download some songs on it for me. He was only twelve, however, his age didn't really matter to me; it was his company that did.

Then, one day, he just stopped coming to the park, and every day I went, in hopes that he would be there. I needed a friend, and he was the only one I had.

But now, I know I don't deserve to have anybody.

When tears began to prick my eyes, I wiped them. But, they kept burning, and an aching sob kept trying to break loose, but I kept it in check.

Cry at school and possibly have someone watch me, to use as another way of taunting me? No thanks.

Wiping my eyes some more, I walked through the main school building, to wherever there were no people. 

"Hey!" A familiar voice called out, and I stopped in my tracks.

"Yes?" I asked, my voice slightly shaky. Not now.

"Are you trying to find another dick to suck or something?" Stacey, my ex-boyfriends younger brother, asked me and I cringed at his harsh words.

Ever since Cameron went off to the military after we broke up, Stacey held a strong grudge against me and never failed to make me feel even more miserable than everyone in the entire school combined.

"I'm going to class," I answered, my voice sounding hoarse.

After Cameron left, Stacey did a one-eighty flip on his personality and dyed his hair black. His old warm, brown eyes now held no familiarity, just hatred.

To tell him the truth, I didn't blame him or anyone for hating me. 

Because, I was a lying, cheating whore after all.

"Wait a second." He tightly grabbed my arm and pulled me back to him.

"What do you want?" I asked, looking down at my shoes.

He gripped my chin and tipped my head up, looking at my face.

"Have you been crying?" He laughed, still analyzing my facial features.

"No." I quickly replied, jerking my face out of his hand.

"You have! Your eyes are red and your face is puffy!" He exclaimed, then began to lightly brush the tips of his fingers up and down my neck. "Plus, the amount of contrast between your skin and blue eyes is astonishing." He began to go lower, to the collar of my shirt.

As his fingers began to fiddle with the black satin bow tied around my collar, his face got closer to my neck. Every exhale he made, landed onto the vein pulsing in my neck. This situation reminded me too much of those nights when I had to earn money for Trenton and me.

"Stop it." I pleaded.

He removed his cold hand from my neck, and I swallowed the lump in my throat. 

I knew Stacey only did it so he could remind me of what kind of person I was.

"I'll stop this one time, but you will get what's coming for you." He threatened with a smirk, and with that, he walked away.

I was too scared to say anything back or even open my mouth. Although he was only sixteen, he still had a somewhat broad build and was 5'11; way taller than 5'3 little ole me. 

I need to go home, away from all this pain and misery...

I began to walk to the front of the school, where the exit and entry for the school were located. But, before I could push on one of the double-doors, I heard a voice call out my name.

A voice I never would've imagined to say my name.

"Hey! Your name is Valerie, right?" The voice said.

I turned around, too stunned to believe this was actually happening. Why is Nathan De Luca, of all people, wanting to talk to me?

"Yes," I replied cautiously.

"Where are you going?" Nathan asked confusedly, frowning at me.

"Home. I can't stay here." I told him, bowing my head down so he couldn't see the sad look on my face.

It took him a moment before he said anything.

"Well, I can give you a ride, if you want." He said, and for a second, I actually considered it.

He's just being nice so he can ruin you, just like everyone else, a voice echoed in my head.

For a moment, I wanted to take his offer up, but then I remembered the difference between him and me. Everyone loved him, and everyone hated me. He most likely lived in a nice house with a loving family, whereas I lived in an abandoned dump with a brother who only wanted me around to get money. Besides, guys like him aren't nice to girls like me for nothing. 

That's how the world was; everyone always wanted something.

"No thank you," I told him, and before he could say anything, I pushed the door and left the building.

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Chapter 4: Finished!😯✔️

What do you think Stacey meant?🤔

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Until the next chapter😘,

~ The Kalopsia❤️