E M P T Y - A Sanders Sides Story

C O N F E S S I O N

If at any point in this story you start to feel triggered or overwhelmed, please stop reading.  Don't force yourself to continue - be kind to yourself <3

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Point of View: Roman, First Person
Timeline: Present Day

"Hey," I looked up to see Patton in the doorway, smiling softly at Virgil. The viewing must have finished. He was still dressed in his gray suit, eyes bloodshot from crying. "He finally fell asleep?" He asked quietly, eyes flicking over to Virgil's sleeping form.

"Yeah," I responded, adjusting the piping bag full of white buttercream frosting in my hands slightly. I had stacked the now cool cakes and now was covering it in white frosting.  "He's been in and out for the past couple hours."

Virgil was sleeping at the moment, sitting cross-legged in the wooden chair. He was currently using his arms as a makeshift pillow. Virgil's hoodie sleeves that were now stained with tears, from the almost constant crying.

Patton took a step forward, gently brushing his bangs out of Virgil's closed eyes. His own eyes behind his glasses just remained sad and worried.

"You wanna talk?" I asked hesitantly, still keeping my voice down - not wanting to wake Virgil. "You haven't said much about how you were doing... you and Logan always seemed so close."

Patton gave a weak laugh in response but his expression was absolutely devestated. "I can't help thinking that I - I was a bad friend. That I let Logan think that no one could ever love him," Patton murmured. "It just keep running around in my head, if I had just hugged him one more time, if I had just... I don't even know what else... just - done something. If I had shown it more, maybe... maybe it would have been enough to save him."

"We all loved him, and..." I trailed off, seeing the momentary flash of pain across Patton's face as he shook his head.

I set down the piping bag next to the cake. It could wait.  "... Pat?"

"I," Patton raised his hands as if to fix the sleeves of his usual hoodie that his tied over his shoulders.  But since he wasn't wearing it had the moment his hands sort of just awkwardly fell back to his sides.  "I loved Logan... in a way that was more than just friends," Patton murmured the confession.

"Oh," I managed, surprised.  "I didn't realize that you liked him like that.  Oh, Pat, I'm so sorry..."

Patton shook his head, clearly not wanting my condolences.  I guess he'd heard enough of them at the viewing.  "I loved Logan and - I know it was wrong because he was with - with him, but I - " Patton sighed. "It was stupid, but I... I used to hope that he was my soulmate," Patton confessed, eyes watering with unshed tears. "And I felt so terrible, because Logan was so certain that he was his soulmate, that I just didn't say anything and now..."

I got to my feet. I walked around the table and wrapped my arms around Patton, who fell into mine gratefully. Though Patton didn't cry like I expected. Perhaps he was stronger than I gave him credit for. He just hugged me back, burring his face in my shoulder.

"I miss him, Roman," Patton's eyes started watering again and this time I could feel the tears landing on my shirt. "I miss him so much..."

I held Patton closer, doing all I could to comfort him.  "... You're not the only one..."

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