If tomorrow never comes [Complete]

Prologue

He stared at the clock almost willing for it to move faster than the creeping progress it was currently making. And when it finally struck five he sprung up from his seat, nearly power walking out of the room before anyone else barely had a chance to even register that class was over for the day. For the week actually. And the foremost thought on his mind was probably that it had been months since he had experienced a Friday with classes finishing early, no homework, no projects, no shifts in any of his multiple jobs and for once he could simply think about nothing but dragging his feet to his bed and passing out for the rest of the evening. And he had almost made his way to the bus stop when the phone in his pocket vibrated indicating a message from the one person that could either infinitely improve this evening or shatter it into a thousand pieces of crushed hopes.

"Hey Kong. Don't come over tonight. My girlfriend is staying the night."

"Sorry."

He continued reading the text for a few heartbeats with a hitched breath. One that was almost stuck in his throat, unable to give his burning lungs the relief it desperately needed. It wasn't the first time a message like this had flashed on his phone. And it was probably not going to be last. There were many, many opportunities for him to have pondered as to why he put himself through it. Why he continued inflicting this wholly unnecessary pain upon himself. But really, was there truly another option for him?

He sighed. His overly ambitious plans of sleeping the evening away not looking very optimistic anymore. Infact he would have to find an alternate place for the night if he wanted to sleep at all. He was still contemplating his options while formulating his almost customary response.

"Ok P'Arthit. Thanks for letting me know."

And just when he was about to stuff his phone back in the pocket of the near tattered jeans his phoned beeped again and he reluctantly pulled it out once more. Praying desperately that they didn't intend to make their sexcapade into an entire weekend thing.

"Also, mom wanted you to visit home and pick up some stuff. She was complaining that you haven't been back in months. You don't have work tonight right?"

"No P'"

"Good. Go home then and pick up the package. Thanks!"

His fingers shook almost imperceptibly as he slipped the phone back to its place, while he hardened his jaw. His ever present smile nearly almost vanishing behind the grim lines of the mouth. He stiffly crossed the road to the opposite bus stop. His feet battling a silent war with his brain, knowing full well how the events will unfold, but it was next to impossible for him to openly defy even a simple order given by P'Arthit. And if his mom expected him to go back home tonight, then that is where his path will lead him. Irrespective of how much he regrets it in a few short hours.

Frame after frame. Scene after scene. Every landscape, every field, every creek the bus crossed, his eyes glazed over slightly more. His mind firmly shutting off the memories that would do its best to penetrate the wall he has carefully constructed. Every brick placed to shut off the window between his present and the past that was coming full speed towards him. It wasn't months since he had been back home. It was over a year now. Since the day he had moved out to join college he had strictly avoided ever finding his way back home. And maybe he deserved everything he was about to since it took less than an off hand message from P'Arthit to have him run right back to his old demons.

Maybe even half unconsciously he almost missed his stop before he jumped up from his seat and ran towards the exit, his adrenaline lasting all the way till he reached the front door of the grand house. The one place where he had nearly all his happy memories. Yet the one place he hated coming back.