So, I'm super pissed... My parents found my stash of prescription pills in my box... & they ask me,
"Where did you get this? How did you get this? & why did you have it?"
Way to be concerned about me. Go parents. You guys win a Parents of the Year award!
I mean, I've been taking it since she passed away eight months ago, alternating weeks every now & then... But now I gotta resort to my other stash, which leads to me not walking straight, seeing some illusions, my head pounding; basically me being drunk by pills.
I don't want to feel anything, so what I take a pill or two of morphine sulfate? So what I take it in order to feel nothing but good inside? SO WHAT IF I TAKE IT TO OVERDOSE LATER ON JUST TO END IT ALL?! YOU WOULDN'T CARE AT ALL ANY WAYS! I BET YOU WOULDN'T EVEN BAT YOUR EYES TO MY DEATH OR FUNERAL, IF I EVEN HAVE ONE! This is why I'm ending myself.
Cannot wait. Except I have to figure out how I'll go out. Time seems to pass by quicker than normal... Oddly weird, but it's for the better. I'm getting called for dinner, but I don't want to see their disappointed faces at the dinner table. I don't want to hear them lecturing me about my depression & other issues that I have.
I don't want to see them. Period.
I'm done with it all. I don't want to live anymore. I just want to die on the spot.
But I can't be inpatient, nope... I cannot.
Cause if I do it on New Year's Eve, everyone that knew me & hears about the news, they won't just be celebrating New Year's... They'll also be celebrating & suffering about the loss of a person from their lives. God, I'll be so fucking happy. Having them crying & grieving instead of cheering & drinking makes me happy.
I'm high as fuck now. Ha, I can't even keep a stupid ass promise.
Also, my driver's permit came... the photo looks like I took a mugshot.
360 word count.
YOU ARE READING
Journal Number One
Teen FictionHe was an ordinary student... with only several problems. He had a normal life... until "it" happened. He doesn't know how to cope... so he writes it all down in journals. Hidden in his room. What'll you find? Will you find his smile? Or his happine...
