Cupid's Arrow

May 31 - July 13, Travelling

May 31

Life still moves on the same way, as earth-shattering as the moment was when Scot telling me he loved me felt, time still plods relentlessly forward. We won't be able to stay with the village for long. Scot and I have both decided to go back to the states. We are going to resupply at his clinic and visit a couple of his favorite retreats, then we are going to come back together and help these people more. I can't describe how happy that makes me. My life now feels like it doesn't just have a purpose, it has meaning.

June 6

Today is the day. We are leaving the village. I don't know if I will get to see my friends again. Our goodbyes were long. They were filled with tears. They were filled with memories. Little Kamau may not even remember me when he grows up, the babies I have held definitely won't. However, I carry a piece of each of them in my heart now. All the women I have met, all the things I have learned, I will carry them with me for the rest of my life. Chief Imbawa gave us a grand send-off. The warriors and hunters following us far beyond the borders of the village until they could follow no more. We waved goodbye, and then both our parties turned their backs and my friends were left behind. I turned around once and watched as they disappeared. I can't help but feel sorrow. Scot knew what I was feeling. He pulled me into a hug and kissed my forehead, "We will see them again, we will come back, I will bring you back."

June 10

Traveling with Scot is always eye-opening. The things that he knows is amazing. The way he can make me feel is just as amazing. One of my favorite things is when he comes up to me from behind, pulls me into him, and whispers into my ear. I have lost count of the times that he has called me beautiful, dirt tracked down my face and all. I have also lost track of the times he has told me that he loves me. Still, no matter how many times I hear the words they still hit me as hard as they did the first time. My heart stutters. Happiness fills me. Sometimes it is so great that it makes it hard to talk, my throat is tight gets all tight, and my chest feels like it can't contain my heart.

At night we sit and watch the stars. I love seeing them. It never gets old. Watching them with Scot never gets old, we still see shooting stars, so far none of them so spectacular as the first one I saw, nothing with such bright colors. We just sit and talk for long hours into the night. His favorite color is blue. He grew up always wanting to be a doctor, his dream was to help people. One of his favorite places back in the states was actually in Arizona, the landscapes were similar to here. He had always wanted a dog, but, due to his travel, he could never have one. Together we promised that eventually we would get a dog, find one that would fit our lifestyle, find a way to keep him. Each night I fell asleep in his strong arms.

June 15

We are still traveling quickly. Somewhere in this vast expanse, we will end up back in Cairo. I trust Scot implicitly. I haven't even bothered keeping track of the navigation. I know that he won't lead us astray.

June 24

It has been hard the last couple days, water is scarce, we are having to ration it tightly. Scot promises that in a few days it will be better, wherever we are heading will have water. I don't know how much more of this that I can take. We are both on edge, I tend to snap at the little things, at night when it cools off a little and the sun is not baking me alive I apologize, so does he. We will make it out of this together.

June 26

Scot was right. We made it to water. Scot lead us to an oasis. It is beautiful. There are trees and all sorts of animals here. They have all come to share in the life-giving water. I hope to recuperate here for a little bit. I think Scot needs it too.

June 30

We are getting closer to Egypt now. So Scott tells me anyway. While I wish we could stop and rest at Lake Quran I don't think we will have time. Now that we are on the road to home Scot is very driven. I am picking up on the tone as well. The quicker we get to his clinic, the sooner we will be able to get back, back to the village, back to this land, and back to this people. They need us to hurry. If we bring back medicine than children like Mbari need not die. The people will have a way of saving those kids. I will hurry for them.

July 13

I have not been as vigilant as I should have been with my writing. It is so much hotter now though. I don't know how the people or animals survive here. I keep promising myself, once it cools off a bit I will be able to write more. However, I think that this place is only going to get hotter. I find myself wishing for air conditioning and ice.