Cupid's Arrow

January 15 - 24, Strength

January 15

I am getting stronger. Soon I will approach the chief and express my desire to continue on. However, first I need to be healed completely, someday I hope this cough will leave me entirely, for now though, I need to be strong enough that I will not be a burden to those who are traveling with me.

January 16

Today I found out that I am not skilled in the finer arts. This afternoon Nya and the other women decided that rather than continue my circling of the village trying to build my stamina I needed to relax. However, the relaxing they had in mind is not anywhere near peaceful. I am still laughing at the memory. Today I tried to weave. Oh, and I am absolutely completely inept and terrible. This is a skill that even the smallest of the girls in the village can handle. My fingers clumsily tried to weave a basket together. I managed to prick my fingers, and completely ruin an entire set. The women sat around weaving and assumed that I knew what I was doing. I didn't.

Weaving is most definitely not a skill that is taught at the academy and neither is holding a baby both of which I now have experience in. One woman finally turned from the conversation to see the progress I had made. The shock on her face when she saw the tangled mess of nothing I had made would have been comical if it hadn't made my face burn bright red. A new experience for me, embarrassment, never have I wished to hide or to sink into the earth more than in that moment. I let the emotion fill me too strongly, the sands shifted beneath us all before I reigned it in successfully. That is when the laughter started up. At first, the temptation to crawl in a hole and die came back full force. Then I realized how ridiculous my pile of smashed nothing looked compared to the baskets that were being expertly created. I started laughing with them too. I shrugged my shoulders, I wasn't good at weaving baskets, but at least I was among friends. One of the new mothers came over to me, the baby that she held stared at me with bright eyes.

This is where the terrifying part happened, my heart nearly stopped in my chest. She gave me the child and picked up the weaving supplies and took over for me. I was frozen, the child and I stared at each other, sizing each other up. Neither of us was sure what to make of the other. I have never held a child. What was I going to do with it? I stole glances at the other women holding children and tried to imitate them. I bounced him softly and patted his back gently. Then an amazing thing happened. He smiled. I couldn't help it, I smiled back. So there I sat amongst the women of the tribe. They weaved and spoke amongst one another and I held the cutest baby in the village and practiced making him give me the biggest toothless grin I could get.

January 24

As my stamina grows my desire to be off and searching for Scott grows exponentially. However, the medicine man has yet to clear me for travel. It's not that I am not happy here. Quite the opposite actually, after our first awkward encounter this village has become my home. The children and I are growing closer. We teach each other words. So far we have taught each other things like hut, water, food, mother, father, warrior, things like that. Well, at least I hope that we are telling each other the correct thing. Nya has been giggling a little too much now that I think about it. Ah well, it's still a fun way to connect. The women of the village are still aghast at my terrible weaving skills and have slowly been attempting to teach me. I do not have much to do with the men in the village beside the medicine man and the chief. Chief is still considering which of his warriors he will be sending with us to search for Scott.