Dream On Fire

(7) I dont have a right to say this...

I don't have the right to say this... but I will...

I feel sad that you're leaving, I feel sad that you might end up inviting someone else to prom... I'm sad that I know I'll never have a chance with you even though I have been daydreaming about the moment you would have asked me to prom. I sound selfish but I can't help it. I didn't mean to be a burden in your problems or in your life. I don't want you to feel like you need to like me... but I can always hope...

And I can always continue dreaming...

And yet, whenever you need to talk about someone... perhaps your new crush... I won't show my sadness nor jealousy cause I see your perfect smile... and I don't want it to fade away any time soon...

I imagine how I'm gonna be in a class perhaps my homeroom. I imagine people from senior year entering the class with roses or maybe a poster made by an awful handwriting. I can imagine myself slightly laughing about the fact that the posters were hardly made by you with so much love... I feel so much euphoria in this moment and my cheeks start burning... you ask me the soooo dreamed question and all I can do is hug you and whisper in your ear a barely audible "yes". Then everything hits me hard... I am in the classroom you were supposed to ask me to prom. I am in the same desk and with the same people I planned to be around of but... you never appear...

It's too soon to say that you definitely asked someone else out since it's not even close to the end of the year but I can already feel the hurt and disappointment in something... I can never control... in something... I can't help but feel...

As selfish as it is... I still love you and have always had since about three years ago...