Shadows | Clalec

Chapter 30

[make sure to read my other fanfiction after! This chapter is dedicated to @stormlo10 ! Thank you so much for the 8 thousand readers!
I know... I know what you all are thinking... and well... read further but firstly! Vote and please comment while you are reading... x By the 30 votes I will post the next chapter x]

ALEC'S POV

"Alec..." Izzy said and I looked up. I knew that my eyes were now red and swollen. I had been crying for so long now. I wouldn't be surprised to...

"You loved her?" She asked me and I could hear from her voice that she was about to cry. I looked over at Jace who was just staring at his little sister. I couldn't imagine what was going through his mind right now.

The pain he must be feeling right now must be enormous... He had been searching for her for so long and now everything was just gone. She was gone. I could see how happy Jace was when he finally had found her and all the happiness he had was just shattered into pieces. His facial expression was screaming out that he was done. It looked like he was just killed inside out and I did not blame him for it. I would feel the exact same way. In fact, I was feeling this way already.

I nodded my head slowly and looked over at Clary again. She was pale and the blood that came out of her nose was dried up. I was covered in her blood and it made my heart ache. How could she be in so much pain? Why was I not there to save her from it? I would gladly take over her place and suffer instead of her. I would do anything to ensure that she was okay but what I did was never enough. I was never enough because she was gone. She was dead because of me. It was all my fault. Izzy gasped in shock when I nodded and I sighed. I did not wanted her to cry because it would be just too much.

"Alec... I..." Izzy whispered and I shook my head. No one could say now something to me that would make me feel better. I had never felt this much pain. Not even when Agramon became evil. Not when my mother would belittle me or the injuries I had throughout my life due to missions or trainings. I never knew loving someone could hurt so much... I never even realised that I was falling for Clary. What I knew for a fact was that my heart would have a hole inside of it for the rest of my life and no one would be able to fill it up. Only Clary could but she was no longer around to fill it up. She was the reason that my heart was broken... I was broken...

"Just... Izzy... please leave me alone." I said when I stood up with Clary in my hands. Her body was lifeless and Jace looked now at me. I sighed and looked down at Clary and saw that her hand had burn marks on it. My heart dropped and I felt like I could start crying all over again. Without saying anything else I walked inside the club and was making my way out of it so we could go home. What was home without someone you used to love? I knew my heart would never get over this. I would never get over this.

My thoughts travelled me around to the first memory I had of Clary. We met here in this club for the first time and she was the most obnoxious and dumb mundane I had ever seen in my life but yet she had some kind of affection that made me attracted to her but at that time I did not even realise it or I just did not wanted to realise it but I knew it was there. It was there all along. We were meant for each other but I just guess we were not meant to last... It was unfair. This universe was unfair.

I walked outside of the club and I could hear Liz asking Izzy what was going on. Jace was just walking with them. It was like he was a dead body walking around. He was in shock and he was already grieving. I sobbed when I remembered that I yelled at her. The last memory that Clary had of me was me yelling at her in the club. I just wish we could have other memories than just arguing or avoiding each other.

"Alec..." I heard Clary whisper and shocked I gasped. I looked quickly at Clary and my eyes widened when I saw her trying opening her eyes. How was this possible? I felt the pain and I felt that she had no pulse. This was not making sense. I quickly stopped walking.