Can We Get Back The Way We Were?

Part 15

"Naira, what's that mark on your neck?" Tanvi suddenly asked me when I moved my hair from my shoulder to avoid disturbance as I  scrabbled down the notes of what Kartik taught in the class sitting on the first bench itself. As if just waiting for her to blurt out a question my pen dropped off my hand falling to the front. The sudden encounter of Tanvi made me shock, I immediately covered the part with my hair struggling to find words to say, but at the same time trying to control my blush. And to make the whole situation even more embarrassing he picked the pen from the floor and placed it before me with a sound. I looked above to see him smirking, I knew he had heard her say this. "Kya hua naira, koi chot lgi kya.. yaa fr mark Dekh k to..." Before Tanvi's mind moved to that side I immediately covered up.. "Kuch nhi vo Tanvi, Haan vo mchar.. haan raat ko naa I kept the window open while sleeping, to shyd mchr kaat gya Hoga koi.. Haan mchr hi hai" I don't know what I cooked up but that's what came into my mind in the situation. She hummed and continued doing her work but her words had hit the wrong chords of mind at the wrong time. I looked above to see he had already continued teaching but with that goofy kinda smile on his face. Maybe he was thinking the same as I was. My fingers spontaneously reached my neck and the sudden thoughts of last night ran through my mind like shivers. They were ecstatic, they were beautiful causing my cheeks to flush up with the holy colour of love~ red. I lost my attention towards  the lecture as I felt goosebumps at the moment thinking of him, thinking of the night before, thinking of all the beautiful moments we had shared before the dreadful phase, memories, just happy memories. However, Tanvi shook me bringing me out of my trail of these fresh memories. "kya hua khaan kho gyi Naira, likhna nhi hai kya.."She asked... "Haan vo main... Kuch nhi.. likh hi rhi Hun..." I realized the surroundings and looked up to see him smiling at the corner of his lips. ""Uff.. His killer smile.." Shh!! Come out of your drooling world naira and just concentrate on what he's teaching. I turn my head to distract myself. The girl at the side bench was staring at Kartik, even her friend doing the same and both smiling and wispering to each other. And there went my distractions and stuff and I passed an angry look in their direction which went unnoticed by them and looked back at my man, if they can do this why can't I.. I have the license as well na!! I said to myself and continued staring at him this time.

"Excuse me Mr. Goenka, there's an announcement to be made" One of the staff members interrupted the class. "Yes please.." He passed a smile... "Students who want to participate in the Inter-college dance competition can submit there names after this class and come for auditions right at 12 today in the auditorium."... "Wow.... Dance competition.." I kindaa jumped off my seat listening to the announcement. The word dance brought so much joy in me. "Wow naira, tum participate krr rhi ho, mtlb uss din tum aise hi keh rhi thi k tum dance nhi krr skti.." Tanvi uttered in a complaining tone and the most bitter truth of my life hit me hard. How can I forget I cannot dance anymore. Anger took over me, I was hurt by the cruel games of destiny, I felt soo low, my eyes were teary and all I wanted to do was run from there and cry my heart out to him. HIM... the thought of him made me look up, I realised he was looking at me, his eyes were moist, he turned facing the board but his hand went to his cheek to wipe off those tears that were shedding out. Oh no! I am sure he must be feeling guilty again. I know he still blames himself for everything, I have tried a lot explaining him but.. I didn't feel good. I wanted to dance, pursuing my dream was the other reason now, I wanted to dance for him, to get him out of the cloud of guilt he was surrounded by. I was tired of pretending to be ok with not dancing, but his masked guilt and my desire to dance killed me everyday. I wanted to run from there, his heavy eyes were the last thing I wanted to see and to my better luck the class got over and gathering my books I immediately ran from there, not wanting to face even a single person, not even HIM. I couldn't do this to him, he was hurt because of me, because of my dancing problem. I walked as quickly as I could, the tears threatening to fall anytime, I didn't knew where I was going, but when I reached a room I realised my footsteps took me to the dance room. Nothing more seemed haunting right now, I broke down on the floor. The dance room was situated at one corner to avoid disturbance to the classes and since it was morning so it was empty. I looked around at my reflection in the mirrors. Wiping off my tears I stood up, trying to do some steps. My actions were vigorous and I failed at it. "Ahh.." I shrieked as soon as I started with the first step and was about to fall down when he came running holding me in his arms "Naira, ye tum kya krr rhi ho.." I looked into his eyes, his fear struck face seemed on the verge of tears.  He hugged me tight. In a while I wrapped my arms around him breaking down. "I am sorry Kartik, I am sorry, pta ni mujhe achank kya hogya tha....I am sorry, Maine tumhe frse hurt kiya na bhut, I am sorry" I blabbered between my cries. I was guilty of behaving this way. "No naira, it's not your fault, It's all my..." "Dare you say that.." I placed my hand over his lips. "Aah.." I cried a in pain as I tried to move. I had sprained my ankle. "Naira.. ye kya kiya tumne, chlo doctor k pass"... "Nhi Kartik, main spray lga Leti Hun, thoda saa hi hai theek hojayega".. "Spray to main lga deta hun but doctor k pass jana bhi zroori hai, vaise bhi hme tumhare doctor k pass aaj Jana hai, tumhari iss harqt k liye main tumhe aaj injection lgvaunga" He said in a playful tone trying to divert my mind. "Hawww, kitne gnde ho, injection kyun lgvaoge, ab glti se lgg gyi na chot to lgg gyi..".. "Galti se, ji nhi, tumne Meri Jaan ko jaan bujh k chot lgayi hai aur tumhe iski szaa milke hi rhegi.."... "Kartik..tum Na... Bhut dusht ho, main ni chal rhi tumhare saath doctor k pass".... "Tumhe chlne ko kisne Bola hai, ab peir tod liya tumne, chal to vaise bhi nhi skti, mujhe hi utha k leke Jana pdega tumhe.."... "Wow... Very funny..  aap mujhe utha k leke jayenge SIR..".. "G meri madam, ab hmare pass aur koi chara bcha hi khaan hai.... Vaise... Hmne suna hai k aapko kisi machr ne zor se kaat liya..." My cheeks heated up and I smiled. "Haan to, mere flat mein ek bda sa mchr ghusa hua hai, bda hi dusht type ka mchr hai, kaat liya meko SIR."... "Dusht.. tumne mujhe dusht kyun Bola.".."Maine khaan aapko dusht Bola SIR.. Maine to vo mchr ko bola... Aap mchr ho kya ab".... "Arre main mchr thodi Hun, main to mendak Hun.... Trr trr trr..." He enacted that way and I laughed at his expressions. He joined me but stopped after a while looking at my face. This guy knows very well to distract my mind, but what about his own battles that he fights within himself. I need to talk to him, maybe in a way he understands properly. He bandaged my feet and finally I agreed to go to the doctor. "What, it's college.. you can't pick me this way.... What if someone sees us..."... "Let them see, your health is more important than all the people around here, and we are doing no sin. You are my wife and our relationship is something I am very proud of. I don't care. I can't let people speak shit of you"... "Kartik...please... Fine... You can pick me up..but let's leave from the side exit. Noone's there at this time."... "Fine... You and your hiding game.." He seemed a bit annoyed. He doesn't understand, I can't create problems for him because of me.

The doctor did the usual checkup and warned me from doing such acts the next time. "Mrs. Goenka your condition is improving, we can go with an easy surgery if this continues. But you have to be careful, you pulling such stunts is surely not acceptable. Be cautious.." The doctor lectured me. I looked at Kartik. He raised his eyebrows and signaled me to listen to the doctor. I made a grumpy face. He winked at me between his goofy smile.

We decided to go back home from the hospital as the doctor advised me to rest. I know he was just pretending to be ok but he wasn't. He was annoyed, angry not at me but at himself. He picked me up to our flat and made me lay on the bed. No words were exchanged between us. The effect of medication was making me a little drowsy. He turned to go, I clutched his hand... "Khaan jaa rhe ho.. Saath aao na.. mujhe tumhe hug krke sona hai..." I told, he smiled and took me in his arms. I laid my head on his chest, his one arm wrapped around me, other below his head as he stared at the ceiling and I drifted to sleep

Kartik's POV~

I am feeling terrible naira. Main tumhare liye kuch nhi krr paa rha. Aaj tum iss halt mein sirf Meri vjhse ho... Had I not asked you to leave, situations would have been better. Kaash Maine ekbaar tumhari baat sun li hoti.. prr nhi... Mera aggression, Mera gussa  sb khraab krr deta hai.
I looked down to see she had already slept. I carefully placed her head over the pillow and covered her with sheets. Her eyes scrunched a bit, a frown spread over her face when she was at loss of my touch. I smiled and caressed her forehead placing a warm kiss over there, the smile on her face came back. I walked outside. I don't know but I wanted to calm myself down for her. I know she knows that I am still at the same state I was few days back. I can't, I don't know what's happening with me. Frustrated, I went in my flat. I had shifted with naira but i still had the other flat in the building. I walked to the room holding my head which was occupied by a lot of thoughts. My head hurts. Naira's helpless, tear struck face in the dance room flashed infront of my eyes. I searched my cupboard for something but failed in the search. Banging the door in frustration as I turned to go, my eyes went to the bottle kept in the lower shelf. I took it out, looked at it for a while. A thought again pinched my mind, naira asking me to stop it. But the urgency to have it to lessen my pain again arose in my nerves. My addiction to it made me pick a glass and i poured some drink to it. I thought for a moment or two, the thought of naira travelled my mind but then her tear struck face was all I imagined in my memory right now and unfortunately my lips touched the glass. I had taken just one sip when I heard a shout.. "Kartik...." I turned to the door and the glass fell off my hand. There she stood, tears on her cheeks, her eyes red visibly angry but more than that visibly hurt.

Naira's POV~

I was in my sleep when I felt his warmth missing around me. I turned, with my eyes closed hoping him to be on the other side but as I moved my hand over the bed he was absent. I opened my eyes and looked for him. I kindaa limped out of the room to look for him but he wasn't there. I saw the car keys still there, his phone kept on the table and in a state of worry I went to our another flat. I opened the door, seemed like he was here. I walked to his room and what I saw was the hurting site ever. He had that slow poison in his hand. I shouted his name, I was hurt, I was angry at him. How dare he do this? I walked to him. I had nothing to see. His eyes travelled everywhere but me. I looked at his face. Messed up hair, fear, worry, sadness, anger was all I could read. My eyes went to the bottle placed on the table. Without giving second thoughts I picked it up and started gulping it down.

Kartik~
I repeated my mistake. I had hurt her again. I lost the courage to meet her eyes. She walked to me, I shut them tight. As I felt her gaze reverting I opened them to see her picking up the bottle. "Throw it naira, I m sorry..." I said to my heart but to my astonishing surprise she touched it to her lips and began gulping it down.

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Precap~ Drunk Naira...
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Chppal jutte tmaatar kuch bhi faink lo... Sorry for updating it after more than a month!!
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