Locker 17

Chapter 129

The feeling in my stomach is uneasy, almost making me want to vomit, but I can't let this affect me, even if Louis is staring at me like he's never done before. Fuck it's different, it feels like that too, because for once I think I've lost all worries in the world, and it's just him and I, here, right now.

It takes him a minute to compose himself, standing up straight and taking deep breaths. "If that lady wouldn't have interfered and interrupted us while we were in the cafeteria, would you have said that you still love me?"

The moment the question slips from his lips, I'm left frozen, stuck, like every word has been wiped out of my memory. And maybe this is a sign, maybe it's a sign because there's only one word that I seem to have not forgotten. Everything has been wiped, all the memories, all our laughs, our kisses, our cries, our wrongs, every moment of love.

Everything around me is stuck in time, like it's just me, and I'm blinded with no one in front of me. But finally, everything speeds up to time, I can hear all the noises around me and I'm back to face reality.

I look over to the direction of the office then back at Louis. My eyes can't seem to follow my motions, my intentions. My mind and my body are both independent, not following what I want to do. This can't be. My mind is saying one thing and my body another.

And before I can establish what I'm feeling and what I think is right, I know what I'm about to do is for the best, even if Louis want to hear the word "yes" he can't have it this time.

"No," I breathe, jerking my arm away from his grip, and walking away, something I'd never thought I'd do voluntarily. The word takes every last amount of energy, will power I have, that two letter word being it for now..

.

Louis and I are the last ones to enter the office. Niall and Zayn are already standing inside, arms crossed, waiting.

The director doesn't so much, just gives us a few stares, serious ones. The only thing that becomes apparent here are the letters on her desk, they're intriguing, very.

"Get to the point, I have things to do." I snap, starting to make my way to the door. And before I can, Zayn quickly walks across the room to stop me, placing his hand on my chest to make me come to a halt.

I turn back around, huffing. "I called you all in here, because I know you were all close friends with Liam." the director at the desk says. All I can hear after the dead silence that follows, is Louis' soft voice, whispering "No,"

In an instant, it takes me a millisecond to focus on Louis' reaction, he too has turned around to face me at the same time. His eyes are open wide, scared, and I know why.

It doesn't take any more words so I can know what's going on, only the reaction Louis has. I knew this was coming, and I was prepared, after all I was the last person Liam talked to before leaving for good.

This time when trying to make my way out, Zayn doesn't stop me, no one does. No, I don't need comfort, no I don't need someone's pity, no I don't want Louis here right now because I don't want him to see me cry. There, I said it. I'm crying, I'm crying like a little bitch in the middle of the hallway. No one can see me, so I run outside, stopping on the stairs, letting myself drop to the floor.

"I'm not crying, don't cry, stop it." I try to say to myself in a whisper between my sobs. No, I'm not crying because Liam passed, he's in a better place and he's happy. I may have lost a good friend, but I lost my best friend as well, Louis. I just know it was right to say no at the time, now I don't know.

My eyes are glossy, causing my vision to become blurry. Tears run down my cheek and splatter onto the white envelope, causing the ink of my name to smear.