Oath Of Love..

11. Two of a sides of an ailing heart..

                       19th of October 2018👑

                   ❤Shezaadh❤

"Huh? What do you mean??
I croaked..

Does that means he feels the same thing as me.. he sees the connection too.. that similarity.. that purity..

Half of me wanted him to agree and the other half was challenging him not to.. I shot him a look waiting for the answer or to be precise wanting "THAT" answer..

"Shez.. you know.. Maryam.. what would be the exact words that your mind would hit on.. if you are asked to describe her?"

Cheeky.. naughty.. naive and of course beautiful and pure inside out with a childlike yet fiercely strong demeanour.. would be the words but still I kept mum cause I can vaguely see where this is heading and I also know that I will not like how it is gonna end.. 

"If that question is directed at me.. "Naive..naughty.. childish would top the list.." he started staring at the wall.. "but she is also strong,kind,fierce and independent..

He heaved a sigh.. sitting back.. looking anywhere but me "I would use the exact words I would use to describe our chukki.."

"What..?" I asked back in a barely audible tone.. My voice seemed to be hoarse and words found no way out of my throat..

"I don't know shezaadh.. everything about her screams  chukki and that makes me miss her more.." he sighed  in a dejected voice slumping his shoulders..

"Ilthumish.. you compare Maryam to chukki.. how dare you?" I Gritted..

"But shezaadh..  I thought you felt the same too.. the way you admired her and enjoyed every single thing she does.. proved it.. and I bet you still do" he argued..

"How I look at her and what I feel towards her is the same way I look at every single employee of mine.."

"But bro your actions says otherwise.. " he raised his eyebrows..

"Listen Mish.. how can you even compare one regular girl like Maryam to chukki.. someone as irresponsible and cheeky is out chukki..look at her.. someone implorable like her.. someone who doesn't know what manners is.. she is not my chukki.. and she can never be.." I screamed..

"You do know that Maryam is not one of what you say and Woah.. great.. The guy who lectured me on how to respect girls because I disrespected a single girl now insults the girl whom he admired.. whom he respected.. all because his stupid brain  and his crappy male ego doesn't accept what his heart knows.. moreover I'm not saying Maryam is Chukki cause I know she is not.. but still you're ego fails to accept that.. listen buddy you're falling.. crystal clear you are falling for her and you  yourself doesn't want to accept that.. year grow up.." he chuckled wryly..

"Me? Falling for Maryam.. what the crap? Ilthumish get lost before I could break those teeth of yours"

I could feel the rage radiating through out my whole body making me tremble..

"she is your sister Mish.. how can you say something like  this?" I asked him my voice cracking.. this is too much.."

"Exactly my point too.. I see my sister in her in the very way.. but that doesn't mean she is her.. and I can always see without no doubt that my friend who was head over heels in love with my sister is slowly and steadily falling for this girl who is exactly like my sister...my sister is indeed important for me.. and I would go to any extent to find her and I always want what is best for my friend who deserves all the best in the world too..

What do you mean Ilthumish?

"Shezaadh you know what I mean.."

"She is nothing special and she is not my chukki end of the conversation.."

He shrugged looking away.. I could see he was angered too.. even I couldn't believe I spoke so low of Maryam.. she is not even one single thing of what I said.

"Listen.. just because you keep denying doesn't mean the truth is altered.. one thing soo mesmerizing of truth is.. it will find its way out.. in the least way expected.. remember shezaadh you are cheating your own self you do know that don't you? He sighed walking away..

Ilthumish was correct.. Im scared..this is what exactly my heart keeps on repeating but the so called sensible part -My brain keeps on denying..

Yes.. I see my chukki in Maryam.. there is something in her which incessantly keeps on reminding me of "HER".. Every single action of hers no matter how tiny it is resembles my chukki.. and yes I find myself falling for her every single time.."

"Shezaadh Ikam Mahnoor.. this is cheating.." my conscience wailed in a tone of disbelief.." you might see her in Maryam.. You might find yourself conjuring the very image of hers with every act of Maryam.. everything thing of her can still scream chukki but yaar she is not CHUKKI but MARYAM.. you find yourself falling for Maryam not CHUKKI... great year simply great.. how could you... how could you steep so low.. because of this one girl how can your feelings on the girl you've loved your whole life falter.. simply how could you.."

"No.. no.. noo.. I'm not falling for Maryam and My feelings for my chukki shall never falter not until my soul ceases to breath.." I screamed like an idiot..

"Why chukki.. why did you leave... I was fine with the mere memories of you..  and the belief that I will find you very soon.. but why did this Maryam had to enter this life of mine.. why did she fucking have to be the same as you... why does she remind me of you.. why do I feel like falling for her..

Why.. why... why...

😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢

                         🧡Ilthumish🧡

"I knew I was soo harsh on shez.. but how can I not.. when a beautiful life and a future is finding its way towards him.. I want him to admit it.. I want him to grasp it tight.. I want him to lead that beautiful  life he deserves..

Ana was indeed the sister I never had.. shez and Ana was made for each other.. but both of them together seems a fairy tale.. a fantasy.. and I certainly don't want shez to dwell of fantasies  when he can have a fairy tale life of his own, only if he is able to let go..

"Chukki.. I miss you loads too.. wherever you are please make your way towards this soul who is fighting for you or let him make a life of his own with a lovely soul pure as you.. for heavens sake don't destroy  him..

Soo peeps.. here I am after a long long time..

And yeah I know this chap sucks but still..

Soo how's it?

Vote   comment and share..

Until next time..

Allah Hafiz  lovelies😘😘😘