The Secret Between Us [BxB]

14. He Said Nothing

Together, Thomas and I sat in the waiting room of Dr. Yang's office. It was a mixed Doctor's office with a few different specialties all being housed in the same clinic. To anyone else, I could be here for a physical or allergies. 

But in our miniature circle of reality, I was here for my baby girl.

If I still had a baby girl.

My leg bounces up and down uncontrollably from my nerves, shaking the row of seats until Thomas placed a hand on my knee. Forcing me to stop as he rubbed my knee cap for support before moving to take my hand in his.

Last night, this morning, the car ride over here, and now we hadn't spoken a single meaningful word to each other. 

He didn't ask me if I needed anything. He didn't ask me how I was feeling. And he sure as hell didn't ask me if I was okay.

Because he already knew the answer to every question and I gotta admit, I kind of loved him for that.

I was swimming in a state of mild disbelief, protectively running a hand over the small curve of my stomach from my the pocket of my sweatshirt.

I was trying so hard to do everything right, not eating the things that could hurt her, and telling her how much I loved her each and every single day.

So why did she want to leave me?

What did I do wrong? 

Was this some act from above telling me I wouldn't make a good parent? 

The thought brings more tears to my already watery eyes and Thomas wraps his arms around my shoulders, pulling me closer to him while running small circles on my forearm. 

A loud weeping fills the waiting room and I looked over to see a woman exiting Dr. Yang's office, whaling as she used her husband for support. Seeing them made me think I might be in her exact same position within the next fifteen minutes. 

Thomas gently rubs my shoulder and I catch his voice softly talking to me through my daze.

"Hey Matty, they're calling us," He says and I looked at him with fear. His expression, however, remained serious and unchanging. 

I only nodded in response, standing up and walking over to the door with him. 

After being weighed and asked a series of seemingly neverending questions by the nurse, Dr. Yang comes into the room.

"Alright Matthias, so you said you experienced some bleeding? Let's check in then," She says and nods for me to lift up my sweatshirt. I nervously do so and she runs the cold gell over my small tummy. Thomas holds my hand for support and leans against the side of the bed, staring at the blank screen that would soon reveal the truth. 

As soon as she put the wand on my stomach, we could hear a fast heartbeat pumping over the small speakers of the machine. 

"Is that her?" I squeaked, fearing the answer would be no.

"Yes, it's her. Look she's doing just fine," Dr. Yang points out my little girl on the screen where I could see her moving and jumping all over the place. 

"Oh my, She's an active little one, isn't she?" She chuckles as I watch her do a little wave of her hand. I look over to see Thomas' reaction, his face flooding with relief before placing his head down on my shoulder, letting out all his nerves in a cross between a sigh and a slight whimper.

"You should feel some fetal movement any day now, especially with your leaner size and her activity," She adds and I'm overjoyed. Letting out the breath I didn't know I was holding. 

"Christ, she gave me such a fucking scare," I curse under my breath to Dr. Yang's soft smile.

"Everything looks fine. There's no cause for concern. The bleeding could be from a range of things including intercourse, heavy workouts, or lifting things over ten pounds. I'd say take it easy for the next week and keep yourself hydrated with lots of naps and then take it easy on the workouts. You won't need huge muscles to lift her little body when she's born," She says. 

 I look at the screen again, taking in the glimpse of my little one, thankful to see she's doing okay.

"I'll see you in two weeks then," She concludes and exits the room, moving onto her next famous patient. 

I sit up and run a napkin over my stomach to get some of the gell off before turning back to Thomas. Words weren't really needed as he took me into a warm embrace, refusing to let me go. 

"I don't think I've been this nervous since I got my SAT results," he says and I burst out laughing. My laughter turning into a small coughing fit which he pats me on the back and helps me hop off the exam table. 

"Well shit then, nothing like a good heart attack at nine in the morning, but I'm starving. I couldn't eat because I was too nervous," My stomach grumbles as if on cue for dramatic effect.

"Me neither, Breakfast?" He asks as if he was reading my mind and I peck his soft lips as a yes.

"It's a date then," 

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Sorry for the mini heart attack LMAO. 

Is it bad that I write this book to decompress and relax after a long 8-hour shift as a barista? 

#BaristaLife is about to give me an ulcer, I swear to fucking god.