Chapter Forty Five

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Jude

My world got shattered. I could not breathe. How could I breathe after I saw my queen covered in blood and helplessly lying on the ground?

I panicked when Milo told me to hold the wound on her head. I wanted to puke from the horror and fear, yet I snapped out of my daze and put a small amount of pressure on the wound. If I was feeling like that, I could not imagine how her brothers felt about her being in that state. They must have felt worse and more guilty. Her past with her mom's ex-husband, Edmund, was not a walk in the park; it was more like walking on water, knowing it was impossible to do so.

When we arrived at the hospital, I waited outside alone. Everyone else was inside, sitting on the floor, waiting for the doctor and the good news. I did not want to see their expressions. I did not want them to see me crying. I did not want them to hear me screaming from the agony I felt inside. I just did not want them to see me broken. I was a wreck, and I blamed myself for not helping her. I could not do anything. I was a pathetic excuse of a boyfriend. A secret boyfriend. I was a coward.

I sat on the ground near a tree and looked up at the sky. The yellow ball of fire changed to hues of orange and then almost tangerine. It blended with the sky, like a liquid mix dissolving in water. The sun released its rays down upon the clouds of billowing smoke, turning them bright red. It was like the sky itself was furious and mad at what happened to the purest creature ever.

She did not deserve any of that, and I did not deserve her, but I was selfish and could not let her go. After being satisfied with the sky's rage, I closed my eyes for a second and took a deep breath. I stood up, wiped the tears away from my eyes, and slowly walked to the hospital, hoping to receive the good news we had all been waiting for.

As I approached them, Theo saw me and smiled.

The smile gave me the hope that was missing: the hope that I craved. I ran to him and placed my hands on his shoulders. I waited patiently, but he did not talk until Arlo slapped the back of his head. "Tell him already," Arlo ordered, and Theo laughed. Everyone else sighed, but I could tell that it was out of relief.

"Sorry, I just wanted to hear what you'd say, but you didn't utter a word, which shocked me and made me speechless. Anyway, the doctor just came out of her room and told us that she's stable, and she'll wake up in about a week," he explained, and I finally felt like I was breathing again.

"But, he also told us that she broke her right shoulder blade and her right collarbone, and she was lucky that she did not break her back. It was just badly bruised, and that's why she gave that reaction when Milo touched her and made him misdiagnose her. The wound on her head gave her a slight concussion, but it was not that bad. He told us that she'll heal in three months from all her wounds if she gets the right treatment, which she'll get in this hospital." Theo finished talking, and I nodded with a bright smile.

She won't die! Thank you, God.

"We already saw her, so go ahead. We'll be waiting for you outside," Jess told me with a pat on the shoulder, and I nodded. I collected myself and stepped into her room. It was tranquil, and I hated that — I hated the silence. As I saw her peacefully sleeping on the hospital bed, I felt a burning sensation eating me from the inside. I felt useless, yet I grabbed her hand and kissed it gently.

I wanted to say something, but nothing came out of my mouth. I tried but could not form the right words to apologize. I was pathetic after all, and I could not do anything about it. I just kissed Lexi's forehead and walked out of the room, and we all headed home for the day. The doctor said that we needed to go home and get some rest.

~~~

It had been three days since Lexi was taken to the hospital. It had been three days since I last heard her laugh or saw her smile. It had been three days since I last slept. I could not sleep knowing that my girl was in pain.

It was one in the morning when I got the urge to see her face. I went out of our dorm, made no noise, and headed to the hospital without telling anyone. I knew the visiting hours were over, but I had to see her. My gut was telling me to move faster, and I did. When I reached my destination, I tried to blend in with the doctors and nurses so I would not be kicked out. I went to her room without anyone noticing me.

As I opened her door and saw what I saw, I lost it. That was the breaking point of my patience.

At that moment, I was blinded by a rage that tasted bitter yet surprisingly satisfying. He was surprised to see me, so I reached out and punched him in the face. When my fist came in contact with his face, he fell to the ground wailing in pain as I tried to shake the aching aftertaste upon the taste buds of my hand. Much like coffee, its bitterness drew me in to take another sip, knowing I would be more awake. I tackled and held him down so he could not fight back. I seriously doubted he could have anyway as my fists continued to hit his hideous face. I felt guilty, but I could not stop.

So many years of subtle bullying sunk into my mind for Lexi and added a divine spice that completed the vexed dish I was serving. I knew I should have ended it, but I just did not have it in me to stop. "You bastard, it was you who made her like that! It was you who made her so fragile! It was you who ruined her childhood! I will never forgive you," I yelled at Edmund, who was trying to catch his breath as my fists made contact with his face, one after the other. He was trying to suffocate her with a pillow. He was trying to kill her... Again.

"S-stop!" he begged me, but I could not stop. After a while of me hitting him hard, I felt someone grab me from behind. I turned my head and saw Lexi's doctor, and behind him, standing in fear, were a couple of nurses.

"Stop it, Jude, snap out of it. You are killing him! Is this was Lexi wanted?" he shouted, and I stopped resisting. I felt numb as I dropped to the floor. "Why were you doing that?" the doctor asked as the nurses tried to help Edmund to stand on his feet, but he was unconscious. They took him to another room.

"He... H-he was about to kill her. He was suffocating her with a pillow, so I snapped. I couldn't stop! I just couldn't," I explained in a quiet and tired tone. The doctor sighed and nodded with a tight smile.

"So it was self-defense because she couldn't move or even wake up. Don't worry, nothing will happen to you. You protected her, and I admire you for that but tell me, who was he?" the doctor asked as he sat next to me on the floor after checking Lexi and ensuring she was okay and still breathing.

"He's her mother's ex-husband. He always abused her for years because of his twisted mind. He was put in jail, but they recently released him. He didn't think that years of abuse and torture were enough to traumatize a person, let alone a little girl, but he was also not satisfied with her existence in this world. He wanted to kill her. His first attempt was indirect as he let a man almost rape her, but then he took matters into his own hands and let her fall off the cliff, and she ended up here. And as you saw now, he's a psycho!" I explained while feeling the rage build inside of me again.

The doctor slapped the floor with a glare. "Now, I'm angry! When they get here, I will explain everything to the police, so he rots in jail. I will support you if something goes wrong. Now, go call her brothers and tell them what happened. They have the right to know," the doctor said, then stood up and walked out of the room. I did what he said and called them. After I finished talking, I felt something tug on my shirt. I turned around, and happiness filled my heart.

She woke up.

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