The Days I Spent With You

Innocence

Wall #3:

To my only brother,

You have taught me what it is like to only have each other.

You have taught me that sometimes, it is better to live your life in the simplest ways possible, and that it is more beneficial to look for the light that no one else can see; that being able to understand to degrees that only you wish to, will always be your greatest strength.

You have allowed me to grow into my own because of the innocence and simplicity in which you choose to live your youngest life in. You taught me what it meant to be a brother and a down to earth human in ways that I would have never imagined when you first came into my life; responsibility, growth, and patience.

It has always been just the two of us. On the long nights, on the busy days, on the days where I had no idea what I was doing while trying to understand a world and its rotation far too young. It has always been just us; an unbreakable and indescribable bond that bears the pain of years far beyond both our ages. You have been what keeps me going, you have always been the light where there is absolutely none.

You have taught me what it means to take care of someone. Not to just be there, but to know their being inside and out so that whatever comes their way, I will know exactly how they are going to react and exactly how I am going fix it. You have made my heart bigger. You have expanded my mind and soul. You have made me realize the definition of having a safe place. You have made me realize that pain never has to live within you for as long as we are by each other's side.

Through you, I have learned what it takes to have multiple roles within this world. I grew up fast so that you would never have to. I missed out on the things that I loved the most in this world so that you would never have to. I stayed up on the longer nights and woke in the early mornings so that your routines could have normalcy. With that being said, I hope that one day you never realize why I did these things, as they were never your fault. I hope that one day you never realize why I did these things because I know you will feel like you have stripped my life away when that is simply not the case. The universe was just working in its own way, and there is so much life to live; and now, I have a choice in how to live it.

For as long as you have been here I have spent those years figuring out how this world works so that I would be able to share each unknown and every lesson with you. I have been the one to deal with all the situations that have come our way so you would never have to experience the feelings that have consumed me for too long. I have spent that whole time keeping you safe from external factors, and I have spent that whole time giving all that I am so you could reach your absolute full potential and grow in all the proper ways.

Wall number three; a wall that was built for the time that was lost and for the time I will never recover. For the fear of losing more, for all the things I had to leave behind. For not having a choice. A wall that was built for having to do this alone, again.