04- The Preparition to be Alone Again

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Saeyoung and I began talking a lot as we put the chips back up on the shelf, he found it much easier to reach the top of the shelf because he was about 6". I learnt quite a lot about him in that time. I kept quiet for most of it however as I didn't want to say anything dumb.

"So, Y/N, I'm bored of talking about myself and though I never thought I'd say that I want to know more about you." He said passing me a bag of chips. I picked up the bits i'd grabbed beforehand and stood up straight making proper eye contact for the first time in the few moments we'd met for. He had beautiful eyes, a golden yellow, utter perfection. His red hair was insanely bright but it made me feel warm inside. His smile, wow, he had the most fantastic smile, it was contagious really, the way his face looked so bright, innocent and cheerful. The way he stuck a small bit of his tongue out between his teeth would make anyone's heart race, it was as if he was utterly perfect.

"What do you want to know?" I questioned trying my hardest not to stutter. 'Don't fuck this up Y/N' I thought to myself.

"Hmmm tell me your story"

"Well" deep breaths "I'm 17 years old, I live alone most of the time as my dad works away a lot, I don't really have any friends, I love to draw peo- penguins! I love to draw penguins" fuck. He lifted his eyebrow in questioning to what I said.

"Penguins huh? What do you really draw? Hm?" He stared at me and spoke in utter seriousness despite the corner of his lip turning upwards. He was smirking at me like I was a fool to think I could get anything past him.

"I-i like to draw people from afar.." I twiddled my thumbs together. My mind was flooded with thoughts about how he's going to think I'm a creep, what a moron! 

He stared at me for awhile, his eyes narrowed and in my mind I just kept thinking wow I have no friends again what a useless piece of shit you are Y/N L/N.

Before I could speak again to try and salvage the conversation he dashed to another aisle and ran back faster than I could say 'holy shit' with a paper pad and a pencil.

"Draw me." He demanded rather bluntly whisky simultaneously passing me the pad and pencil.

"What?"

"Draw. Me." He repeated slowly.

"O-okay" I splutter taking the pad and pencil in hand, I begin lightly sketching the outlines of his face. He had a sharp jawline (sister sharp bishes) which I haven't had to draw before but I got it in the end. He was smiling brightly just waiting there for me to finish drawing. He looked...amazing. He was the epitome of perfection.

"Are you done?!" He asked almost bursting with excitement he looked like a child it was adorable.

"Ooonnneee secooond aaand, done" I  exclaimed passing him the book excitedly. "I-I hope you like it." The nerves kicked back in again then as I realised this wouldn't last.

(I know this isn't on notepad but girl what do you want from me 😂 just pretend)

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(I know this isn't on notepad but girl what do you want from me 😂 just pretend)

His eyes squinted at first and then brightened almost instantly flinging himself forward he grabbed me and picked me up spinning around in the spot.

"Y/N you are an incredibly talented artist! Why aren't you sharing this with the world?!" He blabbered excitedly. I couldn't think straight the only thing running through my head was 'he's so warm I've never felt this way around someone before' I felt safe. Happy even. I can't lose him.

"I don't know... there's better artists out there than me." Truth actually for once.

"Do I look like I care?! There may be someone 'better' than you but I think you're pretty fucking awesome!" He almost yelled for the entire street to hear.

"R-really?"

"Hell yeah! Anyway shouldn't we get to school? It's getting closer and closer to late." He states.

"Yeah we should go." I reply shooting him a smile.

"M'lady" He put his arm out for me to link it. I laugh a little as I hesitate. He doesn't wait for me to take his arm as he links mine as fast as he can and bolts for the door. I struggle to keep up as I laugh and so does he. I hadn't felt this way in so long. I knew it was going to end but I can enjoy it for now right?

"Onwards!!!" He yells as we run down the street towards school arm in arm laughter mixing with the others. I struggled to keep up, I was fast but he was faster but I managed. I loved this feeling, the feeling of being free per say. It'd been a while since I'd experienced this; I adored it, craved it, yearned for it.

I knew I'd lose Saeyoung to the others when I reached the school gates but I was ready, if he chooses to leave me I won't blame him; being friends with me is social suicide.

Saeyoung was a candle, he'd lit up my life for those very brief moments but I knew another person would blow out that candle and mould the wax to fit into his group of other candles. Candles who'd been forced to comply under his lead and follow without hesitation.

It was sad really. Sad but inevitable.

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Yoooo ya boi actually did something! Next chapter? Right here! The one to come? I have no idea 😂 anyways I hope you liked it and I know I'm a cringey fuck but drop me a vote and a comment it'd be HIGHLY appreciated!!! 💕💕

Side note watch the video at the top it actually killed me 😂

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