Dear Nate {Dear #1}

-Chapter 22-

            “Josh said that?” she asks softly.

            Even though I told her to not interrupt, I didn’t mind when she did. I chuckle. “No, I added that reason because it’s true.” I clear my throat and continue. “I went to visit you that night. I don’t know if you heard because I know someone people in comas can hear what people are saying around them.”

            “I had a feeling,” she says.

            I bring my eyes to meet hers. “Huh?”

            Alison smiles softly. “I-I had a feeling you were with me when I was in the-,” she closes her eyes like it’s painful to say, “coma. I didn’t know, per se, that you visited me, but my mind did I believe. Otherwise why would I have this inkling of you and me?” A small blush appears on her cheeks.

            My stomach flutters at the site of her blush. At least she’s not mad at me.

            “You can continue,” she says, looking down at her lap in embarrassment.

            I nod and sit up straight in the chair. “Okay. So, I visited you that night. I talked about how uncomfortable I felt about reading your personal thoughts. I thought that was wrong.”

            “As you should,” I hear Alison mumble.

            I chuckle again. “Anyway, I asked you if it’s alright. I wanted a sign and I got it.”

            Her face snaps up and her eyes are wide again. “What sign?”

            “After I asked for a sign a machine started going off. I was worried that you’d—yea—but a nurse came in a fixed it. I took that as my sign so I read your journal entries and I’m sorry. I know it was an invasion of privacy, but somewhere in my gut told me it was a good idea. I’m glad I did though. And you’re wrong.” I meet Alison’s gaze again. “I did notice you. I sometimes watched you at your locker, hiding your face. I know that sounds like a stalker, but yea. I did notice you. We should’ve talked more than just that one time I helped you with your books or when I held the door open for you. We were both to blame for not being more than classmates.”

            Alison covers her face with her eyes. “I can’t believe you read my journal. Those were my personal thoughts!” She takes the covers off her legs and sits up; her face contorts in pain until she’s sitting straight. “I’m so embarrassed. I can’t believe Josh will do that.”

            “Don’t blame him,” I say, coming to Josh’s defense. “He has been worried sick about you since the accident. We all are.”

            She sighs. “It’s weird seeing you here,” she admits. “You’ve been my crush since freshman year. I was so used to just admiring from afar, but now—now you’re here, talking to me.” She turns and looks me in the eyes. “How is everything? At school I mean. I know graduation was almost two weeks ago.”

            I let out a sigh of relief. She isn’t mad I read her journal.

            “When everyone first heard of the accident people kept posting on you Facebook page.”

            She rolls her eyes. “Like they even know me.”

            “That’s what I was thinking. By the end of the year people were so worried about prom and graduation it kind of blew over.”

            Alison picks at a string hanging from a tear in her jeans. “I can’t believe I missed graduation.”

            “And prom,” I add.