The One You Can't Forget (The One, #1)

nineteen

Hainsey

For the next half hour, Ems and I say nothing to each other. We just bike in silence through the dense forest, save for our heavy breathing. For her, I guess you could call it comfortable silence. For me, though? I'm so damn uncomfortable I want to bury my head under the sand like a freaking ostrich (even though I know that myth is just a bunch of bullshit).

I don't know why I kissed her like I did, but the fact of the matter is that I still did it. I don't know where my head's been at lately – I'm like a walking contradiction; split right down the middle between wanting her and not wanting her due to inconvenient circumstances. Apart from the inevitable fact that my mom is a heroin addict and bringing Ems into my home life could cause a monstrosity of an earthquake, there's also the fact that she left. It hurts like hell and I always try to convince myself that that very reason is good enough to keep her away, but it can't compare to the fact that she came back for me.

I mentally sigh, feeling an oncoming headache.

Stupid, goddamned emotions – what's the point of them?

"I miss this," Ems finally says, tilting her sun-bruised face up to the sky.

I smile, but a little tightly. If she hadn't left, she wouldn't be missing this alpine scenery and what we're doing.

"What do you miss most?" I ask as we keep biking downhill along the damp boardwalk and through the woods. There's a sense of warmth flooding through me at the familiarity of being with her, of biking beside her and having her attention focused on me. I know it's wrong, but I can't help it – I've missed her. So fucking much.

She glances in my direction, and then looks away just in time to avoid a branch sticking out over the trail. "The alpine air. And the colour of the water. And the forest." She pauses again. Looks at me. "Remember the time we planned to run away together and camp on the other side of Lost Lake?"

"Oh shit," I laugh as the memory comes back to me. "I'd forgotten about that. How old were we? Nine? Ten?"

"Nine," Ems confirms.

"Right," I nod, "and you got in trouble at hockey practice for getting in a fight with Mitchell – "

"And I was too scared to tell my parents!"

"So you planned to pack a week's worth of Oreos and Spitz and run away – "

"And you agreed because you were madly in love with me."

I shrug, and then focus on the sharp corner ahead of us before responding with: "Yeah, whatever, Ems. The only reason I came is because I knew you wouldn't be able to handle the wild on your own without some masculine strength next to you."

She turns to me, a devilish grin on her face. "Please, Hains. You agreed to come because you were hoping to steal a kiss from me at a certain tree."