little lies (an e.d. fanfiction)

✭ chapter 12

claire's pov

i hear my alarm going off and my whole body jolts out of fear, waking me up. it's friday and this is the one and only time i wish it was a monday. i haven't heard from jade in a couple of days. she's probably doing fine in oklahoma anyways.

i'm dreading having to face ethan today and dreading him begging me to go to him and grayson's party tonight. don't get me wrong, i want to go, but i simply just can't. not after what happened with liz.

what if liz tells ethan about my age? or what if serena does? there's too much to stress about and it's all over things i can't control at this point. i sigh and look at my phone.

5:42
ethan: claire answer me srsly. i couldn't stop thinking abt u last night

my heart starts to speed up but i shrug it off. i get up and pick out a shitty outfit after i brush my teeth and instead of wearing my contacts, i decide to wear my glasses.

i don't really seem to care anymore about my appearance now that liz and her little friends don't talk to me anymore. why should i care about what i look like? i have no status without her, and everyone knows it.

i pick out some teal lulu leggings and a white v-neck. i put my hair in a messy bun, and only put on mascara today. what's the point in even trying to look pretty?

i grab my adidas ultra boosts and jog downstairs quietly. i swing my north face backpack over my shoulder and head out the door.

~

the bus ride was awkward, as expected. liz didn't speak to me and i didn't speak to her. it was the kind of thing where we pretend like the other doesn't exist. i wonder what's going on in her head, and i'm sure she wonders what's going on in mine too.

i walk into school and go immediately to class, not wanting to see anyone. as i'm heading to class i see posters around the school with bold letters on them:

CHEER TRYOUTS! monday and tuesday after school from 3:00-4:30! cheer tryout packets are available in the coaches office. show your pride Westway Senior High!

i look at the poster and grin. no one is gonna stop me from trying out, no one. i've been wanting to try out since the first day i came here.

it sucks that Serena will be there, though. she's trying out again since she didn't make the first tryout.

bitch couldn't hang.

i want to tryout and make the team so i can prove that i'm not gonna let them stop me. they're not going to get in the way of me doing what i want to do. no matter how much shit i'm gonna get from them for me still deciding to try out, i don't care. i want to be a part of the team.

i look past the poster and walk into teen leadership. i see mr. kemp by the door collecting our project papers. i quickly put my backpack down and bend over grabbing the paper from my folder. i stand up and look at the paper.

answer to #1- ethan said if he could change anything about him he would change his pride because it seems to make him think he's better than everybody else.

i tear up looking at the questions he's answered, bringing me back to that day. me sitting on his bed laughing and crying with him, feeling the closet i've ever felt to anyone. the day when i had "friends", the day when i had ethan. now i don't talk to anyone.

"claire? what the hell, why haven't you been answering my texts?"

i turn around shocked, and i'm face to face with ethan. his eyes were filled with concern, but anger too. he looked scared.