Until My Last Breath

Chapter 64

I move a bit to the side so my legs are resting on the passengers seat and my back is leaning against the closed car door. "What is it?" I ask, since he hasn't said anything yet.

My hand finds its way automatically into his hair but then I remember that he has that sticky hair glue in it. Shawn chuckles at my frowning face, stroking the hair which has fallen into my face behind my ear. "I wanted to ask you something. It's totally fine if you say no, really.

I just thought it would be nice, you know... because like-" he rambles, pausing before his beautiful brown eyes find mine again. "You don't even know what you do to me." He whispers, the corner of his lips curling up into a smile.

„Just ask." I giggle, caressing his neck gently which he seem to like since he closes his eyes contently for a second.

"So uhm... how do I ask that." "Just spit it out." I say. "Okey... uh Rose I was wondering if you want to make it official. If you want to make us official." Shawn responds, biting his lower lip.

I open my mouth to happily say yes but as I realize what he just said I start overthinking, like always. I can't... 'But you can say I love you and kiss him whenever you please?' My inner voice mocks as I stare into his with hope glistening eyes.

Okey okey... but he should actually know first. Maybe he doesn't want us anymore then but it would be so selfish to keep that to myself.

"Look forget it. I'm sorry-" "But we are official." I joke, nervously stroking trough my hair. "Rose it's fine if you don't want that really." Shawn says, gazing anywhere but my eyes.

„No, it's not that." I gulp, playing with his fingers. "Then what is it? You seemed so distracted today." He asks, holding me tighter. "Shawn..." I murmur, not knowing how to start. Should I tell him now? I have to... or else he would think that I don't want to be his girlfriend.

I look up into his eyes again, sighing as I press my lips to his for short moment. "Hey tell me." He says, his warm hand driving up and down my blanket covered arm.

„Shawn can we please not talk about it today?" I mumble, biting my inner cheek to prevent the upcoming tears from spilling. I just want one more normal night...

„Hey Rose. Please talk to me. I can only help you if you trust me." Shawn replies, a worried expression on his handsome face. I smile slightly, cupping his cheeks with my hands gently.

„I would really love to be your girlfriend Shawn." I say and wide smile appears on his mouth but it soon disappears again. "Don't just say that to changes the subject Rose." Shawn sighs, his thumb driving along my jaw.

„I'm not. I want to be your girlfriend. I'm going  to tell you why I hesitated. I promise but please, let's not talk about it today." I plead.

Shawn sighs, hesitantly  observing my face before the smile returns to his face again. "Okey, love." He whispers, inching his head closer to mine.

"But tomorrow I want to hear all you worries and maybe I can kiss them away." He smiles, tracing my lower lip with his thumb. I nod, closing the small gap between us to finally get lost in this moment like it always happens when we kiss.

His hands find their ways down to my hips, then lightly under the hem of my shirt, causing goosebumps to erupt on my body. His cold fingertips dance over my warm flesh, causing me to bite his lip, a low groan escaping him.

My cheeks flush, as I wrap my arms around his neck. I guess I have the same affects on him,  he has on me. One of his hands wanders uo to my face where he tilts my head lightly, deepening the kiss.

A content sigh leaves my throat as I pull back for hair, Shawns head following immediately so I hold him back giggling. Just as I was about to open my mouth, his phone rings again.

He gazes over to the passenger seat, his eyes widening for a split second before he quickly grabs the phone.

"Do you get threats from crazy haters or something, sometimes?" I ask, remembering the number from earlier.

"Uh that has never happened before, why?" Shawn questions, suddenly seeming so nervous. "It's just that you got a message from an unknown number which also called you earlier. It said 'How often did I tell you to stay away from her? End it or it will have consequences.'

„Oh maybe someone leaked my number? I will just change it, don't worry." "But why would someone send you that?" I ask, skeptically. "Hunny, you don't know how overreacting some fans or haters can be. Don't think about it. It's probably nothing." Shawn chuckles.

I just nod. I don't know if I believe him. He almost jumps as his phone rings once again. He pulls his phone out without me being able to see the caller ID. "It Andrew." He sighs.

„I will be back in a minute. I'm sorry but he only calls if it's important." Shawn adds, kissing my cheek before moving me iff his lap. I watch as he walks to the back of the car. Something is wrong. I can feel it.

I wait a few moments before I carefully open the door, trying to be as quiet as possible. I sneak along it, Shawn fortunately standing with his back to me. "I already told you that I'm not going to do that. No matter what you say." Shawn grumbles. 

„Oh really? I'm not scared of you. Who was the one who left? Not me. So stay out if it. It's the best for her." Shawn says angrily. Wait what....?