Jealous

Chapter Three

3.

I turned around, causing the hoodie to be ripped from his grip. I glare at the boy who caused my lungs distress.

His eyes are a shocking green. Not too cool, but not warm, regarding me with mild interest.

"Tell someone who cares. I can see a group of girls fawning over you, go bother one of them." I snapped, not caring about his name. I didn't want to speak to him.

Sure, I'll admire him from afar, but the closer you get, the more imperfections you see. Unfortunately, he was a different case. He has freckles across the bridge of his nose, although they are a little bit difficult to see with his tan skin, making him more attractive. However, his face is almost symmetrical, other than a lopsided smirk on his lips.

He lifts his hand up to his lips and takes a breath before blowing the smoke into my face. I cough, again. Even though he is good looking, I could feel revulsion crawling up my back. Making me shiver with a mixture of disgust and slight attraction.

I looked pointedly at a group of girls about 20 feet away. They are laughing and giggling. Whispering loudly, hoping to get noticed.

One of them, a stunning redhead, glares at me. Hatred boiling off her gaze. I sent her back a sweet smile. Although, it probably just looks bitchy.

Tyler showed no sign of caring about my less than friendly introduction. Nor did he give any indication that he cared about the group of girls. I'm almost certain that he already knew about them.

I'm about to turn to walk away when I see him. The one guy I hate more than anyone.

Harris is walking towards the ice cream parlor, his arm wrapped around Erika's slim waist as he whispers something into her ear. She giggles lightly and presses a kiss to his cheek. They look so perfect together. Two crooked people in a mutual relationship. I try to remember the last time Harris looked at me like he does with Erika. With a look of mild awe and dare I say, love.

Tyler notices the fact that I'm tense, and turns to look at the cause of my discomfort. He sees the pair walking towards the front door of the parlor and I see his lips tuck downward for a second before he looks back at me.

My ice cream trickled down my hand leaving a sticky residue, it was melting. I shook my hand and licked it unattractively. I looked up to him and rolled my eyes before I looked back at the two.

Harris held the door open for Erika, and they walk both walks in.

It's weird, how Harris and Tyler are almost polar opposites in any way, and yet both are strikingly handsome. To the point of it being painful.

Harris is a golden boy, with dirty blonde hair, and dark blue eyes, while Tyler is what appears to be a bad boy in its purest form, with dark black hair, and green eyes. Harris is a try hard attractive where Tyler does it effortlessly.

Tyler processes my reaction. I watched as his jaw tightened in annoyance.

"What do you have against him?" He asked curiously. I turned to look at him, scowling.

"It really isn't any of your business," I said simply. I then turn on my heel and begin to walk away. Once I'm a few feet away, I turn and look back. I see Tyler looking back at me. I turn back quickly and make my way back to science class.

- - - - - - - -

I throw myself on my bed, trying to relax. It doesn't work, or matter. Everything just changed and as much as I wanted to be okay, I'm not. I have never felt more hurt and I hate how weak I feel. I wish I could forget what had happened, just as easily as I had deleted the picture, and his texts. I wish I had never met him. Because even though I'm better off, I would've rather not feel the way I do.

My traitorous thought wander. I wonder what he and Erika are doing now? At least she is happy. I hope it won't last. I hope she suffers as much as I did. I hope he dumps her for another girl, and then she can feel what it is like to not be good enough.

After it happened, I remember scrolling through my texts with him. All the good nights, good mornings, and I love you's that we'd exchanged. I deleted them all. I couldn't stand it. Every word felt like acid. A lie. He may have been my first love, but I wonder how long that had lasted before he got bored and moved on. I wonder how long I was good enough?

I can't control it. I just feel worthless. But that is okay because at least I know the truth. I know that I will never be good enough, and I'm not going to change myself to try to get his attention. I will do something though because he deserves to suffer at least a little bit.

I wish I could go back, find out sooner. Or something. It's stupid because for a few months I thought that there was a chance we would get married. I was stupid and naive and hopeful, and head over heels in love. After every date, every phone call, every movie, every time we kissed, and he decided to move on.

I stare out my window, the curtains move and I try to contain my frustration. It's okay though. I'm fine. Everything is okay. I turn and scream into my pillow because nothing is okay. I wish I could just not think about anything at all. I kick at my blankets and try to calm down.

Harris decided to lust after Erika. I wasn't enough to fulfill his needs, I wasn't enough.

Maybe, if I hadn't gone searching for the bathroom, or if I had opened the right room first, I wouldn't have known he had cheated. I might be at his house, watching a movie and cuddling. I could've been happy. After all, people say ignorance is bliss. Somehow I feel like it isn't in this case. Because then I would still be caught in his spell. With a guy who no longer cares.

If I hadn't seen them, I would still be in love with someone who was going to break my heart.