I'm Broken but I'm fine

Part 17

LOUIS POV

Two weeks goes by too fast. Two weeks of lectures about how selfish I'm being, two weeks of being alone, two weeks of trying not to go back to the blade. I've been successful in that so far but I don't know how long that will last. I've allowed myself texts to Harry but no calls, the boys have been texting me too and I'm grateful but I still need to keep myself at a distance. I haven't slept in nearly three weeks, an hour or two here and there. I'm haunted with gunshots and dead eyes and blood every time my eyes shut, so I've been staying awake as much as I can. I'm exhausted and ready to give up but something is stopping me.

Im standing in front of the mirror on Monday morning. I've washed my hair die out and taken my eyebrow ring out. My hair is brown and feathery now, I like the change. I put on my black skinny jeans, they are getting to be too big again but I could care less. I then put Harry's white long sleeve sweater on, I stole it from his room and I hug it every night. I need his smell and comfort with me today on my first day of my final year at school. I grab my bag and head to the front door. Mum and Anne are at work so I don't need to pretend I've eaten breakfast. I head out the door and I'm instantly met with a chill, I don't take much notice though, I deserve the pain from the cold. I put my headphones in my phone and turn my music on and begin the short walk to school. My music is Interrupted by a text, I pull my phone out of my pocket and Harry's name flashes across the screen.

'Have a great day today baby, remember that I love you' it says.

I don't respond but smile a little on the inside. When I reach the school my heart rate picks up and I have to stop myself having a panic attack as I walk to my usual locker. As usual no one greets me or talks to me but I don't mind, it's better than being picked on. I make it to my locker, put in the combination and pull out my schedule for this year. I swap my books around and place my backpack inside my locker. I have maths and then science, I'm already dreading this year. I sigh, I'm about to close my locker when it is slammed shut from behind me. My stomach does a flip as I turn around and see my three bullies standing in front of me. A crowd has already gathered, I have been here less than 10 minutes and my torment has already started. I knew Harry and Andy couldn't fix this.

"Good break Lou?" Sam asks sarcastically. His stupid red hair falling over his brown eyes, he must have been working out over the break, he is definitely more muscly and I swallow thickly at the thought of what he could do to me.

"Yah, heard your parents didn't want you, so they sent you away to live with your brother" Seth says laughing, blue eyes shining evilly at me. Seth isn't as big as Sam but definitely stronger than me.

"But your big brother didn't want you either did he little Lou? Cause he sent you back didn't he, not before threatening us though right" James spits at me. He has brown hair and the most intimidating brown eyes I've ever seen. He is bigger than both boys and will do the most damage to me, the worst thing is though, we used to be best friends.

"Not going to talk to us huh?" Seth asks.

"We don't like being threatened Louis, do you understand? I don't know why you thought you could come back and not be taught a lesson this year" James says and the other two laugh.

I suck in a breath and go to walk off, I'm grabbed though and my books thrown to the floor. I'm then dragged to the nearest boys bathroom and the torment begins. I'm thrown to the floor and James lands a swift kick to my ribs. I cry out in pain.

"Still a pussy I see" Seth laughs.

He then grabs me and pulls me to him and grips my arms, my back against his chest. He holds me while James and Sam attack me, Sam goes for my face and I get a punch to my eye and jaw, it aches so badly and I see blood, meaning my lip must have split. James then starts on my torso, my ribs are assaulted and my kidneys kicked. I'm pushed to the ground again and the three of them start their assault. I don't fight back as it makes it worse and I don't stand a chance. I just try to deal with the pain, I think of Harry and it somehow gets me through. They finally let up after five long minutes and I can hardly breathe.